(Closed) How much to give sibling as a wedding gift.

posted 4 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 46
Member
2506 posts
Sugar bee

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anonymombuzz:  really hard to say, and everyone’s situation is different. my Fiance and I gave my sister and her husband $1500. we’re pretty well off compared with them (they’re both teachers), and we wanted to give them a gift that could send them on vacation (they were waivering about taking a honeymoon for financial reasons). we do not expect a gift from them that’s anything close to what we gave them (which we told them when we gave them the gift, and my Brother-In-Law said – are you crazy? we can’t give you a $1500 gift when you get married – and tried to give it back); in fact, while they’ll probably give us something, i’d be happy if they didn’t give us anything at all (BIL is officiating our wedding, so that’s gift enough).

fwiw, Fiance and I were both at my sister’s wedding (I was the MOH), so also bought the dress, planned the bridal shower, bachlorette, etc.

give the what you can afford, simple. if you can only afford $50, give that. if you make $$$ and want to send them $5k, go for it.

Post # 47
Member
2506 posts
Sugar bee

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lovealways:  as someone who is now planning a NYC area wedding…$300 doesn’t even cover both plates, let alone “a little extra” lol

Post # 48
Member
3610 posts
Sugar bee

Give according to your means and your relationship with your sibling. My brother isn’t giving us anything that I know of, and I wouldn’t want him to. He’s still young and doesn’t make much money yet, plus we live in NYC where there is an extremely high COL, so I would much rather he put his money toward expenses or better yet, savings instead of using it toward a wedding gift for me. For him, I would give $2,500+. He’s my only sibling and I’m several years older, my Fiance and I are financially established, and we are both close to him.

Post # 49
Member
409 posts
Helper bee

There are some wealthy bees on here! My sister is unemployed but still managed and supported some pre-wedding parties for me…that was probably all she is going to contribute but thats enough

Post # 50
Member
2394 posts
Buzzing bee

Holy cow! Some of these gifts are outrageous. My brother didn’t give us anything. He read in our wedding and ran errands for us the morning of, which was gift enough! If and when he gets married, I’ll give a gift off the registry and will be spending $100 – $150.

Post # 51
Member
1003 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2018

Depends on your financials, but I echo PP I will likely give my sister $1000 (500 each from me and my SO) for her upcoming nuptials 

Post # 52
Member
6518 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

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anonymombuzz:  for my SILs wedding we gave $500, at the time we were working part time, hadn’t gradutate college yet, so thats what we could afford – we saved up to give her that.

Post # 53
Member
6949 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

Wow, wild variations in responses here.  I’d probably do about $200 and think I was being generous prior to reading this thread.  

My sister made use a painting from a photo I sent her.  Husband’s brothers (there are 5) gave us nothing at all, and that includes the one who is my age – mid thirties, who is also the only one who didn’t have to travel.  Just having them come out was really enough for us – the youngers are all busy with college life.  I wouldn’t dream of accepting hundreds and definitely not thousands of dollars from any of them, my older sister included.

OP, it doesn’t sound like you can go wrong, whatever you choose to do.

Post # 54
Member
1115 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2017 - Mississauga Convention Centre

For our engagement party our siblings gave us between $400 and $650

Post # 55
Member
2689 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

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FantasticFawn :  I am accepting applications for siblings btw lol

I would give 200 to 300 per person attention the wedding. Depending what I can afford.

My sisters helped pay for my wedding dress and held my bridal party. One hosted my rehearsal dinner so they spent at least 750 each which Im so greatful for, I’m the baby though and they are much older than me!

One of my brothers gave me 100.00. So it really varies.

Post # 56
Member
553 posts
Busy bee

In my family we give anywhere from $250 to $500.  Usually more like $250 or $300.  I would never give less than that.

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