(Closed) How much would your SO have to earn for you to be a SAHM?

posted 8 years ago in TTC
Post # 62
Member
22 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Well, personally, I think it’s dangerous to up and quit your job, a good steady income, to be a Stay-At-Home Mom.  in this economy….dangerous.  What if your husband got laid off? Then what would you do?  You have to realize that if you are out of work for several years, when the time comes when you NEED to go get a job, it will be VERY VERY difficult if not impossible for you.  An employer will not want to hire a woman who has not been in the workforce for many years.  Maybe only a minimum wage job, maybe…. What if your husband gets sick or injured and loses his job?  You need to keep your work skills up.  You need to have a marketable job skill, training, degree, certification and experience in SOMETHING that is marketable – something needed in today’s workforce. IF your husband loses his job, you will NOT have health insurance.  Dangerous!!!   People never see divorce coming, but…. you just never know.  I know women who feel so stuck in loveless long-term marriages that were SAHMs and cannot divorce because they know they’d never be able to survive in the real world without their husband’s money. 

It depends on where you live, but here in NJ it would be impossible to live on one income.  In other states, maybe it’s OK.  But you cannnot have a new car, or vacations other than visiting relatives or camping. No expensive smart phone plan, no spas or beauty treatments, no brand new electronics and no big house.  IF you are OK with living a simple life without extras and are HAPPY – then I’d say OK ! 

 

You can also look for work as a in-home babysitter / daycare provider to bring in money.

 

Post # 63
Member
2902 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

Between 200k and 300k. $200k being the bare minimum.

 

Sad

Post # 64
Member
4304 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

We just do not have a lot of expenses… I think we could make it by on 50k.  We’re not big spenders and we have saved some money.

But I rather he did that before I quit my job.  I think I would go into a severe depression sitting at home with a crib midget all day.

Post # 65
Member
501 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Probably around 150-200K. We would still need to be able to take vacations regularly and continue with the things we enjoy. I don’t know, I’m just enjoying being married right now. Not thinking too hard abot kids for about 2 more years.

Post # 66
Member
1030 posts
Bumble bee

I earn £24,000 ($38,000) which is £1,500 ($2,350) a month.

My SO recently lost his job but luckily their redundancy was very generous and he was given 2x his monthly salary when he left, so we’re good if he can find anothr job quickly!

We had a chat about it, and I could just about pay for the two of us if I had to.

Our joint rent and bills come to £1,000, we usually spend £300 a month on food and we each have approx £100 in personal outgoings.

It would be INCREDIBLY tight.

So going on that – I would say he would need to earn an absolute minimum of £30,000 a year/£1,800 a month ($47,600/$2,850) in order for us to afford a baby.

We’re only quite young (25) and we live in a 2 bed apartment – no car, but our city is amazing and we can walk everywhere.

In a few years his wage shoud have hit that and then some so we should be okay. I don’t know anyone who has fancy spa treatments monthly, or even go on an amazing holiday each year – so that’s definitely not a lifestyle we’re used to!

The average income for a family of 4 in the UK is £40,000 ($63,000).

Post # 67
Member
1542 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

A LOT – an amount neither of us will ever get to on our own… He’d be happy being a Stay-At-Home Dad – I might lose my mind. I’d rather go to work – atleast part time.

 

Post # 68
Member
1660 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I’m really surprised that so many people feel they would need 100k+ after taxes!!! Yikes! It will be awhile before my DH makes that much. I am toying with the idea of staying home, in which case we’d have about 70k after taxes. I think we’d have to be careful with expenditures, but we could probably make that work. We don’t have any debt (other than mortgage) and have pretty good savings/retirement. For now, I’m planning to go back full time, but may cut my hours down to 28 per week (lowest that still counts as full time for benefits). If we have another child, I will definitely stay home or work on a very part-time basis for a year or two.

Post # 69
Member
2116 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

He’d have to make what we both make together right now. Sooo…at least $120k a year (not sure how much per month)

 

ETA: And I mean before taxes because I’m not 100% positive about the number we make after taxes.

Post # 70
Member
684 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

wow! i’m kind of dumb founded by some of your responses….. My Fiance makes $75k p/a i’m a stay at home mum to 4 …. yes 4 children! we live comfortably, the kids have evrything they want and need. Our bills are paid and we still have money left over. We have a mortgage x2, a car loan, and a personal loan. We do not have any credit cards (they are evil!)

If he made $250k p/a we’d be rolling in cash!!! I just don’t understand why on Earth you think you need that much money to have a baby. My kids are aged 16, 13 8 & 2, and my Fiance has a 13 year old from a previous relationship. I do not get child support for any of my kids, we pay child support. Sorry i just don’t get it :S

Post # 71
Member
2699 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

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@lookingglass: The average income is 40k? God. I earn 30 k and dh earns 40k and we also live in a 2 bed flat and if we want a house and a baby then i have to go STRAIGHT bk to work after maternity. Im shocked the average is 40k for a family of 4!!

Post # 72
Member
2699 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

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@Toastymama:  I imagine its a combination of  how much debt you  have combined with lifestyle choices. I admire people who can budget so well!

Post # 73
Member
2699 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

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@Toastymama:  I imagine its a combination of  how much debt you  have combined with lifestyle choices. I admire people who can budget so well!

Post # 74
Member
15059 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

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@78h2o:   I said 11k/month after taxes because.  We’d want 2k/month to make up for retriement contributions I wouldnt be making if I wasnt working, 3k/month mortgage+taxes, factor in 1k/2 cars, 1k food, 1k utilities, 1k other misc, 2k savings to be comfortable.  Yes we could probably do with a bunch less, but I wouldnt want to and would not stop working if we had  to.

View original reply
@Toastymama:  wow! i’m kind of dumb founded by some of your responses….. My Fiance makes $75k p/a i’m a stay at home mum to 4.

First where are you from, because it’s totally normal to pay 2k+ (on the low end) for a mortgage here.  That’s 35k pre tax if you’re lucky enough to get a house that cheap in a decent area.

Post # 75
Member
3771 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Probably around $60K we’d be happy with. We live pretty simple, have no debt, and few bills. And it wouldn’t necessarily be me being the Stay-At-Home Mom… Fiance may be the Stay-At-Home Dad depending on who makes more money when we get pregnant.

Edit: Totally meant yearly with that number

Post # 76
Member
11324 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

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@Toastymama:  Like ticatica said… just depends on what your bills are. We couldn’t pay our current bills with no kids on 75k/year. Our fixed expenses (mortgage, utilities, car payments, insurance, cell phones (our only phones), student loans) + food = more than $50k out of pocket per year. And thats before ANY discretionary money, gas money, “oh shit the dishwasher broke” money, savings, retirement, etc. 

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