How often do you talk to MIL?

posted 1 year ago in Married Life
Post # 31
1361 posts
Bumble bee


After several years of marriage I keep in touch with Mother-In-Law pretty regularly, texting within every two weeks or so.  Get together about once a month.  

But I did not keep an open line of texting or calling going with my Mother-In-Law when we were newlyweds.  When we were newlyweds we pretty much just got together for holidays & birthdays and had space in between.  If I remember correctly.  I would not worry about staying in closer contact with your mil while a newlywed.  I think it’s standard that in laws would give the new couple space to settle in to their new lives together.

Post # 32
869 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

my mother in law lives a mile away from me, 7 minutes with red lights. before i would only see her or speak to her about once a month at least. but since my sister in law was preg and she lives there i would see her a lot more but i didnt really speak to her directly more like i showed up to her house.

for the most part my mother in law and i get along great because of my distance. she is intrusive and gossipy so living at her close or trying to be buddy buddy with her is last on my list. but we are both into plants and gardening so i often will send her pics of plants she has gifted me and is gifts me plants every chance she gets. so i guess we have our own thing going

Post # 33
13597 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

My Mother-In-Law and I talk one-on-one rarely.  We have a civil, albeit tense, relationship.  We live quite a distance from them and don’t see eye to eye on a lot of things.  I find it hard to have a conversation with her about anything more than superficial fluff. 

Post # 34
763 posts
Busy bee

We text each other nearly everyday and we talk on the phone once or twice a week. We live a couple hours away from each other by plane. 

Post # 35
1104 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

About never. Only when I have to see her, which is painful.

Terrified to announce this pregnancy to the in laws for fear that she will ramp up communication. Life.

Post # 36
47 posts
  • Wedding: May 2019

avedaprincess :  My Future Mother-In-Law and family lives an hour from my house, but I’ve also been living at college and away for an internship.  I see them probably twice a month.  I probably talk to her at least 3 times a week.  She is a total sweetheart (as is the rest of my fiance’s family) and I love her.  I couldn’t be marrying into a better family.  My fiance is staying with his parents this summer so he talks to her everyday, haha.  But when he is living away he probably talks to her a few times a week, but not really any long conversations.


My fiance, on the other hand, probably talks to my mom a few times a month, max.  They aren’t very close.  Nothing is necessarily wrong, but he isn’t one to text a lot or be on the phone.  We probably see my parents about once a month or so.  There’s really no “right” amount of time you should be talking to your in-laws.  Everyone’s different.  Maybe you can reach out to her, just to update her on your newlywed lives?  I’m sure she would still love to hear from you even if she is hearing from her son already.

Post # 37
6444 posts
Bee Keeper

After working on our relationship we talk probably a few times a week.

Post # 39
1359 posts
Bumble bee

Don’t feel bad. I don’t have a close relationship with my Mother-In-Law either. She is difficult to be around and even her kids and grandkids struggle to be around her at times.  My husband does try to involve her in our lives and we’ll always be there to celebrate birthdays, family events and holidays with her, but I don’t talk to her much beyond that.  I don’t like talking to her on the phone either as she can be rude and intrusive.  I don’t crave a close relationship with her at all.

Post # 40
1097 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

I think this is one that will vary a lot, person to person. I talk to my parents once a week, D H talks to his a bit less frequently. We will often put them on speaker phone so we’re both talking to them together. I have very little in common with his mom (neither does he) so there’s not a lot to talk about with her. His dad and stepmom are easier to converse with. We don’t live close to any of our parents but see them a couple times a year.

Post # 41
105 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

avedaprincess :  Mine lives a 10 minute walk away and I do not see her or the rest of DH’s side unless there is a holiday, birthday or family event. Usually once or twice a month. there are a few months where I have noticed there are no birthdays or events (November and January and March) and I don’t see them at all. It is not bad but I was surprised (we have only been married a bit over a year and we live with my parents). I wouldn’t worry about it. Most guys know their moms and would tell their wives if more of an effort needed to be made.

Leave a comment

Find Amazing Vendors