How often does your SO call you beautiful or gorgeous?

posted 2 weeks ago in Relationships
Post # 2
Member
102 posts
Blushing bee

hunterfigi1 :  let me ask you, how often do you compliment your bf ? how often do you make him feel good ? ( complimenting him too, little surprises, show him you love him etc )

relationship is 2 ways, it is giving and taking, IF you “stop” make him feel good and only demanding him to make you feel good. No no it is not working that way. 

 

Post # 4
Member
5409 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: July 2018

This is the least of your worries…

Post # 6
Member
1479 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2019 - City, State

Sounds like either a misunderstanding of love languages or something more dysfunctional.  My SO says it pretty much every day, but it’s just because he’s a super verbal love-giver.  Your fiance might not be.

Post # 7
Member
62 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2020

My partner calls me cute or compliments my outfit or my appearance pretty regularly/almost daily. That’s also because we’re very open with each other about what we NEED in a relationship, and we’ve had some good chats in the past about how that’s the kind of affection/love language I need 🙂 

I feel like the lack of affection or compliments from your fiance may be the symptom of other issues, if you guys are arguing a lot. You could sit him down and talk to him about how you don’t need “constant re-assurance”, but that compliments are part of how you feel loved/satisfied in a relationship, so when that’s lacking, it makes you feel insecure. TBH though… he kinda sounds like a dick :/ 

Post # 8
Member
533 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2019

I think you guys have bigger issues TBH. My Darling Husband says it almost every day but we are very happy so.. again, I think this is the least of your worries. 

Post # 10
Member
5455 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2017

My husband never says that to me, he also never tells me that he loves me. I say “I love you” and he says “I know”. He also doesn’t apologize.

He sounds like an asshole. If I posted something like that, I would probably be told to leave him

But he shows me that he cares for me and that he loves me. I see his actions so I’m fine without his words. He makes me feel loved, heard, and respected so I don’t need him to say those things. After I snapped at him a few years ago and we got in a fight after I locked my keys in my car, he came home, dropped my key off and left. When I went outside, my car was cleared of snow and was running. That was his way of apologizing. He really does sound like an ass, but I just love and accept him for who he is, and I look at how he treats me instead of looking for his words.

I think if you felt cared for and loved, the lack of words wouldn’t bother you.

Is he showing you that he loves you and cares about you? Is he doing things that you over look?

It could be that you’re not noticing things that he does that show you that he cares. OR, he might not be happy and that’s why he’s not acting like he cares about you.

Post # 11
Member
5455 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2017

He’s trying to tell you that what he does and what he says is not good enough, are you hearing what HE’S saying?

Post # 13
Member
81 posts
Worker bee

My SO will tell me I look beautiful on occasions where I may get a little more dressed up than usual, or if I am wearing a new outfit or something. Otherwise, he will tell me I look cute or nice randomly. 

Post # 14
Member
500 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2005

Its really hard to compliment someone when there is arguing. You cant force someone to give you words of affirmation when they arent feeling them. He is right in that, when things arent so tense that these things will flow more naturally. Do you want fake compliments with no real meaning behind them or would you rather have them come from a place of love and in a natural way?

Telling someone you dont like them right now is not conducive to them giving you compliments. If every time he gives you a compliment you say I dont like you, you are training him with your response that those compliments dont really mean anything. 

You want them when you want them, but he isnt some machine who can pop them out whenever you decide you want one. He is giving you compliments if he calls you sexy, you are just deciding those arent the ones you want. You have to accept that when someone compliments you, its their way, not yours. 

Lastly, the best compliments are the ones that come when you least expect them. 

 

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