(Closed) How Old is 'Too Old' to have your first child?

posted 7 years ago in Babies
  • poll: How Old is 'Too Old' to start having kids?

    25

    30

    35

    40

    45

    50

    55

    60

    65

  • Post # 47
    Member
    2490 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2018

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    @KateByDesign:  lol I know. I read the 29 comment and choked on my latte.

    Post # 48
    Member
    6891 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    Well I had MY first child at the age of 37 and he came out healthy. I want another child and will be 40 in the fall so yeah I refuse to vote on age….

    Post # 49
    Member
    8007 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2010

    I had my first baby at 26 and my second at 34. Given what I know from my life experience I would say 35 would be the latest age for my first- hypothetically.  But that is just my personal opinion.  I am 36 now and DH and I are deciding whether or not to have one last baby.  But if we do, I will be 37 by the time it is born.  That is pushing it for me. 

     

    Post # 50
    Member
    2214 posts
    Buzzing bee

    I voted for 45, but now that I’m thinking it about it, maybe 40 would have been better for me. I want to retire around 60, and ideally I’d like any child(ren) I have to be out of college when I retire. But my absolute max would be 45 for any biological kids. I would be open to adopting after that.

    Post # 51
    Member
    633 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    I voted 35 – but would more so lean to having my first child by age 30 – purely based on the increased health risks of waiting to have children past age 30 (IE: increased breast cancer risk)

    Post # 52
    Member
    57 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

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    @BluePeaches:  I agree. At that age (40), there starts to be issues with the baby.

    I don’t care either way if we have kids, but I’m telling him at 34. “Last chance because once I hit 35 the fatory is closed.” I am too paranoid about having children past this date as 35 seems to be the last viable year before too many variables can impact the kid.

    However, if the doctor can assure you a healthy child (everyone is different)… then I guess there’s no problem.

    Post # 53
    Member
    424 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    I don’t think there is a set age where someone is too old.  It really depends on the individual and how they want to live their life.  I see nothing wrong with older moms or younger moms provided they love their children and can provide for their needs.  For me personally, I would *like* to be done having kids by age 35.  I’m about a month away from the due date for my first And I’m 29.  We would really like 2 kids, about 2-3 years apart.  But, sometimes things do not go as planned, so if we have trouble conceiving #2 I am certainly not going to stop trying just because I turn 35.  That would just be the ideal situation.  

    Post # 54
    Member
    1377 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    IMO, I think nature does a pretty good job of deciding for women. I would say 50 is too old but the baby factory closes for most women in their early-mid 40s it seems. If someone can become pregnant in their 40s with no or minimal assistance, good for them! But taking extreme measures to fight against what nature intended so a woman can have a baby post-menopause…not such a fan. 

     

     And what about the guys? They don’t really have a biological clock to worry about. What’s too old for them? I admit I get kind of judgy when I see men over 50 with newborns. Just because you can doesn’t mean it’s a good idea.

     

    I doubt S/O and I will put an age limit on it. We’ll stop whenever we feel our family is complete. If we are unable to conceive, we’ll adopt but not go back on birth control in hopes that a bio kid would still be in the plan for us.

     

    Post # 55
    Member
    1190 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: February 2014

    I won’t try after 35, but I am 32 and pregnant with my third (I may want four… that was “the plan”)  But I think women should be empowered to make reproductive choices that are right for them, so I’d never say there is an age where you are too old to become a mother.  I think it’s more important to look at overall health.  I know some 45 year olds healthier than some 25 year olds.  I think that matters the most.

    Post # 56
    Member
    1660 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: January 2012

    I say 50/55 as long as the mother is healthy… I’m not one to judge when someone starts their family.  You never know their life circumstances.

    That said, for me personally, I would like to be done having kids by the time I’m 35. But if that doesn’t happen I wouldn’t stop trying just because I’m a certain age.

    Post # 57
    Member
    4581 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    My personal cut off is 35. I’m about to turn 30 and give birth to my first baby, but I plan to be done having any additional kids by 35.

    Post # 58
    Member
    7367 posts
    Busy Beekeeper

    My BF is private nurse. She works exclusively on cases with babies, children or young adults with disablities. None of them were born to women over 35. Most were born to women in their mid 20’s. These are healthy, well educated couples. Life just happens. So to me its all the stats in the world about advance maternal age are not going to scare me. I though by now I would have had kids, sorry life didn’t turn out how expected. I’m fourty now, after 45 I will no longer seek motherhood.

     

    Post # 59
    Member
    6354 posts
    Bee Keeper

    I would only stop trying once I know I’m going through menopause. I’m a very healthy person so I have no reason to believe I’ll not have the energy to chase toddlers etc., by a certain age.

    Also because of my low-toxin lifestyle, I believe my chances for a healthy pregnancy are higher than average, regardless of age. Age is but a number…that is loosely correlated with health. You can decouple them.

    Post # 60
    Member
    2091 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    Well… I voted 50, but not for me specifically. I do not want to have kids after 40… I have a son, I had him when I was 23. In many ways, I wish I would have waited. This is because I am still working on my career. I wish I could give him the best of everything, and that is not how it has been. If I have anymore kids, they will reap the benefits of success more than he would. Those kids will have a less stressed but more tired version of me. I think when parents wait too long they are more like grandparents and their kids get away with way too much. Our bodies tell lus when it is too late to have our own. There is always adoption, but I think it would be crazy to have the first child at 60… 

    Post # 61
    Member
    904 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: December 2013

    For me personally, I’d like to be finished having kids by 35. My Mom had me at 28 and my brother at 33 and she said she noticed a HUGE difference in her energy levels. 

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