Post # 31
My post vanished…
I was 17 and engaged. First baby at 19, second at 25. He broke 3 engagements before relenting to marriage 19 years later! Needless to say, we were divorced in our 25th year.
I don’t regret my children, but I regret trying to create a perfect family for so long, with an unhappy and unwilling participant. Because I came ftom a shattered home, all I wanted was to keep glueing my relationship together. I could not give up. He ended it to relive his youth.
Now, I am 44, with an excellent man. We marry next year. My only regret is our ages. Because THIS is the man that would be an excellent father, is an amazing partner, and he will never know the joy of fatherhood.
My ex was, in many ways, a poor father. It affected my children, and his miserable nature towards all of us definitely impacted their development.
Moral of the story, time won’t make someone appreciate or want you more, despite all your good efforts. Time is your most valuable posession, don’t waste it.
Post # 32
daenerystargaryen93 : the right time depends more on if you find the right person than what your age is. I got married (finally!) at 34. As per my plan, we were married a year before trying for kids, just to make sure we settled in well. Now I’ll be 38 when the second baby comes. This is not ideal, IMO. Sure I didn’t ‘waste’ my youth but I’d like to have more stamina now than I do. I could just eat and exercise better to help, but I don’t/won’t. For me, high 20s would have been better but it is what it is. Some people are healthier later in life, or more responsible. Some probably should skip the kids altogether because they aren’t in a secure partnership or are going to pass something on to the kids that they are better off without (a crapshoot for everyone, admittedly). Definitely a terrible idea to get married to whoever just because of an arbitrary timeline.
Post # 33
I don’t fit into your choices.
Married at 21, first child at 30, last child at nearly 42, within a month of our 20th wedding anniversary. Best anniversary present ever!
Anyway that worked for us and I have seen many other different and just as successful timelines.
However, it’s worth noting thathaving children before you are emotionally and/or financially ready to look after them is extremely risky for all concerned.
Post # 34
Married at 24 (me) and 26 (hubby). We are planning on TTC later this year when I am 27 and husband will be short of 30 by 2 months. So realistically the youngest we’d be when a baby arrives is 28 and 30.
Post # 35
Married at 25, baby at 27. It was a good time but could have been better. We’re 30 now and still don’t have our careers completely figured out.
Post # 36
Married at 28. First kid by 31.
Honestly would have been sooner if I didnt have fertility problems.
But my husband is 6 years older then me and has always said he wants to be done with the kid thing by the time he hits 40. So as far as the kids thing goes. I think we are done.
Post # 37
daenerystargaryen93 : I got married at 41 and I had children never. So for me those are the perfect ages; 41 to get married and never on kids. Does that help you, op?
Post # 38
Married at 28.
Kids at 29, 30, 33, 34.
Your poll options are hilariously bad. How old are you? 17? I’m trying to figure out why it seems like your poll indicates 30s are the death of all options.
Post # 39
Another one not on your poll age range. Married at 31, late term loss at 33, first daughter at 34, and second daughter at 38, well into geriatric territory. I don’t regret waiting, and I’m generally where I want to be.
Post # 40
Last year 42% of all mothers were 30 plus. You need to look at your poll
Post # 41
Married- 26, kid#1- 28, kid#2-30
Post # 42
- Wedding: February 2018 - UK
Married at 33. No plans to have kids, which is probably a good thing, since according to the poll I’m in the ancient club too!
Post # 43
- Wedding: May 2019 - Baltimore, MD
No kids, but we were engaged at 31, and I married at 32.
Post # 44
Married at 33. Now 34, and nowhere feel ready for kids, though we do want them. I don’t want to wait too long though, so I imagine TTC will come in the next 2-3 years? (I’ll be 36/37, hubby will be over 40 by then 😮)
Post # 45
Married at 27, kids probably not until I’m closer to 30. Guess that means I justttt made your cut off.