(Closed) How old will you be when you get married?

posted 4 years ago in Beehive
Post # 76
Member
89 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: February 2017

I absolutely think that fianancial and career stability is a factor that impacts if someone is ready for marriage, but I’m not sure I would call it the most important factors.

I will be 29 and he will be 32. It is our first (& only!)marriage

Post # 77
Member
10 posts
Newbee

Well we are not engaged yet but I will most likely be 36 and he will be 33 when we actually get married. Geez I’m getting old lol. That’s if we get married next year. May have to roll it over to 2017 if he doesn’t propose this year.  First and ONLY marriage for both of us. We have been together for 5 years. We are financially secure and have no children other than furkids lol

Post # 78
Member
463 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2016 - Miami

delphinia:  I’ll be 30, my fiancé 35

Career and financial security definitely help, and factor in. But definitely not the sole two factors.

I do ffirmly believe in being financially stable before getting married. Career goes with that, though people certainly go through career changes too (and it helps having a supportive spouse to accomplish that). 

I don’t get the drop-off after 32. People only become more financially stable and more established in their careers throughout their 30s and 40s. I wonder if the data was oversimplified? Getting married is still something people tend to do in their 20s and early 30s, so maybe more people getting married later are on their second marriage, and those have a lower success rate? I don’t know if that’s true, just speculating… 

  • This reply was modified 4 years, 2 months ago by  LaHormiga.
Post # 79
Member
1312 posts
Bumble bee

delphinia:  I never really believe studies like that. I think there are tons of factors why a marriage does/doesn’t work. Anyway, we will be our current ages when we get married (I’m 25 and he’s 34).

Post # 80
Member
217 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

I saw that article as well, if it makes you feel any better the research conducted was questionable at best and they attributed the drop in successful marriage in the later 30’s-40’s to being mostly second time relationships or relationships with “baggage”.

That being said, my Fiance and I will both be 38. My second, his first. We have been together (living together) 10 years.

An actual scientific and well researched divorce predictor is based on the work of John Gottman (he has followed thousands of couples over 35+ years). I suggest reading “7 Principles to making marriage work” or “The Relationship Cure”. If your too lazy to buy a book then check out online resources on the 4 horseman predictors at http://www.acouplesplace.com/Gottmans_Four_Horsemen_are_Divorce_Predictors.html

He has an 80%+ accuracy rate in predicting divorce based on these 4 tennants in speaking to a couple in a short time. I teach this stuff in my own couples therapy.

Post # 81
Member
1444 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I had just turned 24, Darling Husband was close to 26.

I read a study which suggested that age is most important in terms of when you first live together, because that’s pretty much marital roles anyways, so you’re more likely to succeed if you’re mature enough for that.

I feel like the 32+ thing is because it’s more likely to be a 2nd marriage, and if you’re willing to get divorced once, you’re more likely to be willing to get divorced again than someone who has never been divorced. And maybe  the older people get they are more likely to rush into marriage because they feel they’re too old to be single.

Our marriage might be slightly more stable if we had been more stable on our own before moving in together, but we communicate really well and are very compatible, so I’m not concerned 🙂

Post # 82
Member
165 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2016

26 (almost 27) we waited until we both graduated from law school, passed the bar and bought a house until we even really got in depth planning! When we get married I’ll be three years into my career and he will be four– and we will have been engaged for nearly four years!

Post # 83
Member
20 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2016

I will be 23 and he will be 24 first wedding for both of us.

Post # 84
Member
1126 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2016 - A View West

i will be 30 and fiance will be 32

Post # 85
Member
442 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2015 - City, State

I’m 25 and Darling Husband 26. I do admit that all of a sudden i felt really young after the wedding was over!

Post # 86
Member
158 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

We’ll both be 32 – first marriages for both of us.

Post # 87
Member
1812 posts
Buzzing bee

I will be 40, Fiance will be 36 (go me! Lol). My first marriage (but my 3rd proposal), his second (11 years in his previous marriage). 

Statistics are kind of like horoscopes–sometimes the shoe fits and sometimes reality takes over and an occurrence (or two or a thousand) defy said statistics daily. Statistics also change…so I tend to not hang my hat on them.

I’m certain our age and experiences coupled with our place in life brought us to one another and subsequently a mature, healthy, lasting love.

Post # 88
Member
372 posts
Helper bee

First marriage for both of us! Ill be 30 and he will be 29 (ya that’s right woo younger man haha) after 8 years of dating! We own our home and both have decent paying jobs. We wanted those securities before getting married. 

  • This reply was modified 4 years, 2 months ago by  jesais.

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