(Closed) How Rude??

posted 4 years ago in Parties
Post # 2
2092 posts
Buzzing bee

Do you know how she was contacted? 

I know I have had people get upset with me for not responding to them, only to find out later that they’d sent me a message on facebook (which I dont use much) or they’d emailed an old address or texted me from a number I didnt recognise and didnt identify themselves. 

Post # 3
1772 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

You are overreacting imo. Nobody should be kicked our of a bridal party or Bach party because she didn’t respond to a shower RSVP. going to the shower isn’t even required, so why would you punish her for something you didn’t even notice personally when it’s not even mandatory. Best of luck w everything

Post # 4
320 posts
Helper bee

I wouldn’t be that upset about it, so long as it doesn’t indicate any hard feelings on her part towards you or the wedding. She may not have gotten the invitation, or may have gotten busy and just had it slip her mind to respond with regrets if she was unable to attend. Sometimes people get busy and forget things. It doesn’t seem malicious, but with more information maybe I’d feel differently. I hope you work it out with her for whatever is best for you though, and that he bachelorette party is fun!

Post # 5
46670 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I wouldn’t get my knickers in a knot over something like this. You don’t have the whole story so take a breath, jump down from your pedestal and let it go.

Post # 6
452 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2013 - Garden

This seems pretty normal to me. I had a few people who didn’t RSVP to my actual wedding, I think most brides experience this. For some people it just isn’t a priority to let you know if they can’t come. Weird, but it’s totally common!

This friend obviously had plans or for whatever reason didn’t want to come. She certainly isn’t obligated to! She is already making the effort to come and celebrate with you at your bachelorette. Don’t let her non-attendance at the shower overshadow the day for you.

I can definitely understand why you’re feeling upset about it, but if I were you I’d try to let it go. If she keeps being a flakey friend in future maybe reconsider, but if this is just a once-off just put it down to life getting in the way.

Post # 7
609 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2016

I’m so glad you had a great shower!


Has anyone spoke to her either yesterday or today? Maybe she had some sort of emergency and couldn’t make it. How was she contacted about the shower? Perhaps she was sent an email to an address she doesn’t use anymore, or a FB she doesn’t check often etc. There are a million reasons. Try not to get too upset and waste energy on this until you find out exactly why she wasn’t there

Post # 9
4412 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

PAbee913:  Sounds like a lovely shower. RSVPs, no matter how many people deal with in their life, are always a source of frustration. I would just let it go. Enjoy your upcoming events because who knows what happened-she could have completely forgotten, had a committment, or it could have been sent to the wrong address. I had a friend say she was coming to both my showers and didn’t show. I just had to let it go as it wasn’t worth getting upset over. 

Post # 12
4925 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

It’s possible she either forgot, didn’t get the invite or was unable to afford a gift. It’s not likely personal. Let it go. 

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