Post # 1
Hey guys. I lurk and post on the boards now and then and it seems like there are loads of posts of women asking how they should feel about something and is it ok to be mad about XYZ? Why do you think this is? I just think it’s really interesting….because I mean…if XYZ happened to you and you felt a certain way, why do you need validation from your peers? Is this a woman only type thing? I don’t see guys asking this too often. It makes me sad to be honest, because it’s like women need permission to feel upset or angry about something. I just wanted to know what you guys think.
Post # 3
Well I think sometimes in the heat of the moment and especially in the middle of wedding planning, small things can get blown a little out of proportion. But if you’re mad at you SO, of course he/ she’s going to say you’re being ridiculous. I think it helps people to post the argument, and see if complete strangers think you’re upset for no reason, or if you are justified. It really has no relevance to the actual argument, but if you see other strangers saying “yeah, you’re right!” or “no, you’re being silly!” it might calm you down a little.
Post # 4
@AllShookUp: Agreed. Perspective is a wonderful thing!
Post # 5
I honestly don’t know how much help they get from comments, either. On a single thread you’ll see both “You’re over-reacting” and “You’re so right to be throwing him out” – or “Yes that’s rude,” and “No that’s not rude at all I’m totally doing that, too”
Post # 6
@ProfessorGirl: ain’t that the truth!
I think it’s good to get some perspective, however there are threads where the person is strictly looking for validation. That’s what I find annoying.
Post # 7
@ProfessorGirl: I agree.
Sometimes there are some useful insights, but it’s always all over the board. I think posts that ask for advice on how to approach/fix the problem seem to be much more helpful than those that just ask “are my feelings justified?”.
Post # 8
Fair enough about the perspective thing. I was talking more about people seeking validation. I just wonder why this is the case.
Post # 9
@ProfessorGirl: it’s true there’s usually a lot of replies, but I think if the OP really reads through them, one will pop out to her/him and they’ll go … “You know what? That makes sense to me.” Sometimes it’s what they knew deep down, sometimes it’s something they didn’t think of. So everyone can throw out any opinion they want to, but we always read things through our own filter, and if we don’t like the response, we usually don’t concentrate on it so much.
Post # 10
@Pixie79: I think a lot of the posts ask for advice on whether or not they should address the situation or just let it go.