(Closed) How should I handle this?

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
3620 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I would just say that you don’t want to put unnecessary pressure on her, moves are extremely stressful and settling in to a new lifestyle is equally challenging – ask her if she’d like to participate in another way!

Post # 4
Member
174 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I would tell her your concerns like you just told us… let her know that you want her to be there on your big day, but think its best that she not be in the wedding since she has so many exciting things going on in her life. I would even pay her back for her dress… do you by chance have someone else who happens to be her size that can step in? Then problem solved. I would rather cut my losses than deal with the not knowing with her… Since she has not particiapted at all – seems there is no loss.

She may be upset – but you have been upset over the recent events as well.

Post # 6
Member
174 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

@zippylef:Then I would recommend you ask her to and stress that you know she is so busy with her move and it is best for you both. It will be hard, but probably best for you in th end.

Post # 7
Member
1088 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I can’t really give you advice in this situation because it’syour choice on how to handle it. But, I will tell you how I handled my BMs:

I got tired of worrying baout if people had paid, picked up, or altered their dresses. I realized that a few weeks before my wedding things weren’t paid for, altered, anything. I just had to let it go. I got to a point where it didn’t matter if they didn’t show. If they didn’t then they didn’t. What could I do about it? I chose to give people the benefit of the doubt. Through the whole process, I did learn though who my real friends were. I learned who is responsible, who really wnated to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man and who really wished they hadn’t said “yes”. Good luck and I hope you can figure out a solution, or at least just let her not screw up your plans or make you feel more stressed than you have to be.

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