(Closed) How should I handle this?

posted 5 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
9917 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

@JacobsMama:  Either tell her you don’t want her to wear it, or don’t worry about it.  

Post # 4
881 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

@JacobsMama:  I would just ask if she could just wear it for the reception. That seems fair enough since she didn’t know before she made it that you’d care but I agree it may look weird during the ceremony. 

Post # 5
2610 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014 - Madison, WI

I agree about nicely asking her not to wear it for the ceremony if it is that overpowering.

Post # 6
11752 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I don’t see how it would take any attention off you so I would let her wear it. If you feel that strongly just kindly tell her you prefer she doesn’t. Or, get matching hair pieces for all the girls.

Post # 7
7311 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

I generally err on the side of embracing a maid’s individuality. If it REALLY bothers you, I think PPs made a great suggestion re. asking her to save the hairpiece for the reception.

Post # 8
2287 posts
Buzzing bee

You could make it clear that when you said they could wear their hair any way they want to, you meant style wise — up, down, to the side — but that accessories such as the one she made are not a part of that.

That’s why I’m not a fan of letting people pick what they want to wear, especially without approval first, unless you really mean ‘anything’. It’s fine to give lots of options, but leaving it as open as “anything you want” gives them too much leeway. 

I wouldn’t let her wear the flowers at all, not even to the reception. 

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