(Closed) How should we address invitations in this circumstance?

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
3092 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I would say separate invites and no plus one for either.

Post # 5
Member
333 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@LostInWonderland:  i agree with icetea. although i have a friend who does not live with her boyfriend, but we are inviting him and just putting his name on her invite. this is because she is one of my best friends, but they haven’t been together long and i don’t know him that well. if they are both good friends of yours, i would go for separate invites.

Post # 6
Member
333 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@LostInWonderland:  oh ok, saw your edit. maybe just send to one (the girl?) and let them know it’s just for practical purposes?

Post # 7
Member
1699 posts
Bumble bee

I am guessing then, that you have the choice between templates reading either “invite you” or “invite you and your guest”. If that is the case, go with the template that does not include the “and guest” wording. Since etiquette requires that the guests be named by name inside the envelope somewhere, you then write “Ms Jones and guest” on the inner envelope, belly-band, or on the invitation itself for the people to whom you wish to extend two invitations, and “Miss Phipps” for the people whom you are inviting solo.

Actually, unless the guest is named “Joe Guest” or something — and even then it should be “and Mr Guest” — a truly gracious hostess never extends invitation to “and guest”. She calls up Ms Jones and asks “is there someone you would like me to invite, so that you can attend together?” and upon being told that Ms Jones is seeing Mr Doe, she extends an invitation to Mr Doe: personally, in his own name, in writing and to his own address. Which is another reason to have the invitations worded for solo invitations.

Post # 8
Member
1060 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I would adress it to both of them and mail it to one of the addresses, maybe whoever you met first or lives closest or whatever. Before we lived together me and Fiance would get invites addressed to both of us but usually delivered to him and I had zero issues with it.

Post # 9
Member
993 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

is there a way you can put both names on one envelope and just send it to one address?  I guess your other option is send them each one individually but that seems unnecessary

Post # 10
Member
1190 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

My invitations didn’t say anything about guests. I let them figure out who was all invited by looking at who the envelope was addressed to. This way you would only need to use one invitation!

Examples..

Mr so and so & Ms. So and So  (I Think this would work best in this situation!)

or

mr so and so and Guest

or

Mrs and Mr so and so and Family

or 

Mr. and Mrs. So and so

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