How soon after getting married did people start mentioning kids?

posted 1 year ago in Babies
Post # 16
Member
3529 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 29th, 2016

missviolet92 :  My mom brought it up while we were engaged. She said, “You don’t have to be married to have a baby, you know!” which was the opposite of what most moms that I know would say. My in-laws have been pestering us for cousins for their children since we got married, too. Our families have been very impatient. But here we are, 2 years married and ready to start. Follow your own timeline, because at the end of the day, you have to live with the outcomes. 

Post # 17
Member
1983 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2016 - Sussex, UK

D.H’s much older cousin whispered to me at our wedding “you two are going to make a honeymoon baby.” Creepy AF. Been asked regularly since then and we’ve been trying for over a year now which makes it all the more fun. Since more people know I have endometriosis they’ve  backed off a bit but one of D.H’s friends messages me every few weeks asking if he’s going to be an uncle yet. D.H had a word with him but he still does it.

Post # 18
Member
713 posts
Busy bee

Only people that have asked were his family. Hy husband is 6 years older than me and I’m in my mid 20s. I said a few times that I wasn’t really interested in a baby and that my mom had me in her late 30s, so we’d be waiting a while. After they kept pesting I said “Husband got to spend his entire 20s not having to change a single diaper, I would like that same privilege”. They haven’t asked since. 

Post # 19
Member
498 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

We’re not married yet, but I’ve been asked about our plans for kids ever since we got engaged. Most of the people who have asked are close friends, and I don’t mind. Having said that, I have only answered in a vague ‘well, we are an older couple so I don’t expect we’ll hang around for more than a few years’. 

In reality, we are planning to start trying immediately.

Post # 20
Member
359 posts
Helper bee

Literally every step of the way. When we announced the engagement, when I bought my dress, the day of the wedding, most days afterwards, the day we adopted our cat, etc. It’s never ending, and always from people who have no right to ask.

Post # 21
Member
190 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2019

Well my mum started I’d say at least 2 years before we got engaged! She’s constantly complaining about how long she’s been waiting for grandkids…I’m only 25 lol. You’d think she’d stop for a bit now that the wedding is in 8 months and I’ve already ordered my dress (that wouldn’t fit a baby bump), but no. Fiance’s mum also said that there was still time for a baby then when we decided on our wedding date 😂 But she was joking I hope. Collegues ask me all the time too now that I’m engaged! I’m a bit worried how bad people will be (especially my mum) after the wedding…

Post # 22
Member
1296 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

The long distance part of our relationship ended in October. I think by the end of October, people were asking. We had only been together 6 months or so by that point. I’m sure it’s only going to get worse when we get married next October.

Post # 23
Member
3583 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

missviolet92 :  people mentioned it BEFORE the wedding, but we’ve been pretty open and aggressive about being CFBC so it seems like most everyone got the point and had stopped asking 

Post # 24
Member
127 posts
Blushing bee

FI’s mom is pretty religious and we got a “Well the wedding is in less than 9 months now so if you had a baby that would be fine!” because I guess that getting pregnant out of wedlock is fine as long as you get married before the baby crowns undecided

We’re excited to start a family so we talk about it often. FSMIL is also excited but is respectful so I don’t see her getting out of hand with it. 

The questions will start to roll in as soon as we’re married but our honeymoon is a few months after the wedding so at least I have the built in answer of “not until after that!”

Post # 25
Member
2014 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

No one has asked. I laid the ground work during the engagement that asking will get you an answer you don’t want. “Never” “Maybe one a long time from now” We don’t know if we want kids” or “I don’t like talking about that”

Asking about when or if someone will reporduce is weird and I made it clear we will not talk about it unless we want to. 

Post # 26
Member
203 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

As soon as we said “I Do”. We were 25.

Dating: When are you getting engaged?

Engaged: When are you getting married?

Married: When are you having kids?

1st Kid: When are you having another one?

It never ends… 

Post # 27
Member
995 posts
Busy bee

I been asked about it before I even graduated college, not financially stable yet, and was not dating anyone seriously. Maybe it is because I am an only child…. no clue. 

I am sure we will get asked as soon as we get married but we planned to start as soon as that happens anyways… or get ready for it. I will probably be almost 31 by then. 

Post # 28
Member
876 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

missviolet92 :  before we were even married. My reply: “Not yet [smile sweetly]” 

Post # 29
Member
6435 posts
Bee Keeper

We had kids before we were even married ha.  But after our first was born we didn’t have another one for a bit.

Post # 30
Member
9610 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

We don’t get a lot of questions about kids but we did get some even before the wedding. We’ve gotten more now that my SIL is pregnant. 

We are only 28 so we’ve got lots of time but we’ve been together 10 years so I guess people assume we want to move on to the next step or whatever. But at this point we probably won’t start TTC until we are at least 30. 

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