(Closed) how soon is too soon to ask?

posted 5 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
8695 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

I think it depends on the person. Some will say it is too soon and others will say you can ask now. 

Post # 4
5001 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

Unless you’re 100% sure and would not “fire” any of them, then I think it’s ok to ask them a year out. However, a lot of times people have problems so I’d wait as long as you can!

Post # 5
1076 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

I think there’s no such thing as too soon, it sounds like you’re really sure about your girls, so go ahead and ask, then you can share all the excitement with them! I would just caution you though, that things happen sometimes that might lead to them not being able to be a bridesmaid. For example, one of my girls got pregnant, and her due date is a month before my wedding. I hope nothing like that happens to you, but if so, don’t be upset if they can’t be bridesmaids.


It’s funny because I’m having the opposite problem. I have yet to ask my Future Sister-In-Law to be a bridesmaid, because I don’t know her well and I’m really shy, so I just don’t know HOW to ask her.

Post # 6
7736 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@RunnerBride13:  I agree it’s fine to ask them now if they’re reliable. I’ve read a lot of bridesmaid drama but most of it comes back to poor choice of bridesmaid. If you know they are true friends, who will stand by you no matter what, then it’s fine to ask them 12 months out.

I had my two bridesmaids (best friend and sister) picked out about 10 years before I met my husband! I asked them immediately, 10 months before my wedding.

Post # 8
6349 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2014

We’re having a 3.5 year engagement; as soon as I told them we were engaged, they assumed they were going to be bridesmaids, and were right lol.

I think that if a) you are totally, 100% sure, as I was and b) you expect anything of them (such as buying their outfits, helping out with wedding-related activities, etc) then the sooner you ask the better from their point of view as it gives them time to save/plan.

Post # 9
8579 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

I asking my maids 1 year out.. so this October =]

Post # 10
671 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I asked a year out, and now regret it. I wish I would have asked closed to wedding, because now some of my wedding party is just unsupportive and not helping at all, and if I knew that then I wouldn’t have asked

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