Post # 1
I’ve just started wedding planning, and I’m super excited. My groom and I are not into “traditional” weddings, so we want to do something nice that fits our style, but we’re not too concerned with doing it the “typical” way.
We would like for the wedding to be on the beach in FL near my family. His family is in Ohio, and we know that not all of them will be able to travel to Florida. We would like to do a cookout celebration at a park in his hometown after we get back from Florida. This way, we can celebrate with his family without them feeling pressure to make it to Florida.
We also want to do this on a tight budget. I’m hoping to keep the Florida celebration under $5,000. According to budgets online, this gives me about $150 on stationary/paper. I don’t think that we can afford two mailings (save the dates and invitations). Can I just send the invitation? If so, would it be poor taste to send it out early — like send it out in January for a wedding at the end of May? Since it may require some travel, I want to give people advance notice. I’m thinking that I’ll put an extra RSVP card for the people who are invited around Ohio that explains the BBQ in Ohio and asks for an RSVP to that as well. So basically, one massive mailing. Is that okay?
Also – Anyone try to do save the dates electronically? That could be a cost-effective option.
I appreciate any advice and input!
Post # 2
Yes, you can do that. Save the dates are a more recent trend and not required
Post # 3
hippiechic74: why not do an online save the date then follow up with an paper invitation later on?
Post # 4
Just do online Save-The-Date Cards. I think since it is a semi-destination wedding, a save the date would be a good idea. 4 months might not be enough to book tickets and accomodations, take time off work, and get organized to leave.
You should look into getting your invites somewhere affordable too, like Vistaprint.
Post # 5
hippiechic74: I think your ideas are great! I would highly recommend Zazzle and Etsy if you’re going the physical invitation route, as that’s where I ordered different components for our invitations (I went completely perfectionist on them and ended up half DIY-ing them haha) and the prices are awesome!
Weddings should be a reflection and celebration of the couple, and you should totally do everything the way that feels like you and your SO, even if you forgo any ‘traditional’ (totally subjective btw) elements 🙂
Post # 6
Save the dates are not required. It doesn’t take a formal mailing to get details out. Presumably at 5,000 you are going to have to limit the guest list to people you are in frequent communication with.
But no you cannot, rather should not send out invites so far in advance. Aside from the etiquette of it, practically, puerile will say they are going to try and make it, but work, life, death all come up and plans will change. The reason invites go out 6 to 8 weeks ahead is because that’s really when people know their schedules, work, and financial situations best.
Post # 7
You don’t have to do save the date. I would look imto Visatprint as they were the best price I found and they have lots I options, all customizable. I just got married in FL and our budget was $5K as well. PM me for more info if you’d like! Good luck!
Post # 8
hippiechic74: How many households do you need to send save the dates and invites to?
I think you can totally use Vistaprint and get both for $150 or less. They have 50% off sales a few times a year (and 40% off, and lower, but wait for half off!), and even back when I was looking at 80 guests, I was using coupon codes to score invitations for like 50 bucks.
Granted, they weren’t fancy pocketfolds with multiple inserts and cards and all that – but they were really pretty card-style invitations with front and back printing.
I do think you should do some sort of save the date, whether paper or electronic, considering your FI’s family would need to travel from Ohio to Florida. Even if you think they can’t all make it, you shouldn’t wait until invites go out a few months before for them to even get notice – then they might think it was on purpose or feel slighted.
Post # 9
We sent out save the dates and invitations to 20 households and with postage it was less than 150. The save the dates were postcards of the river we are getting married next to and we ran them through the printer at home. The invitations and respose cards were really cheap and we bought them through Zazzle. Zazzle has tons of different themes and you can do a lot of customizing. I don’t have inner envelopes but no one keeps those anyway. You could skip on the s-t-ds and just do word of mouth.
Post # 10
I think that sounds totally fine! We are basically doing the same thing. We didn’t send Save the Dates in the mail to cut costs. I sent an electronic STD to my friends using Paperless Post – I would highly recommend them! It was easy to put together, and I used designs that were free, so it came at no cost to me!
We are also sending our invites about 3 weeks-1 month earlier than what is recomended, since not everyone is getting Save the Dates. (I only sent them to friends whose emails I already had – I couldn’t justify collecting all 220 email addresses, in addition to 220 mailing addresses!).
Post # 11
E-mailed save the dates, especially if you have your wedding website link on them (since you’re having a DW), is probably the way to go. You need to share a lot of travel and lodging information on there. Although not everyone has internet access, I’m sure they know someone who does.
Post # 12
I’m doing a destination wedding and then also a celebration back at home afterwards. I suggest sending out Save the Dates, even if they’re only done via an online option. That’s better than nothing. I don’t know how many people you’re planning on inviting, but our Destination Wedding is very small and even though I basically told everyone that was invited in person the date and to start saving if they wanted to come, many people don’t really consider themselves officially invited until they get an invitation our STD. Brides and groom’s change their minds all the time while planning. I’ve known some people that say they’re having a Destination Wedding but then a month later it’s all changed. So the STD usually let’s people know this is officially what you’re doing.
I also second the people that are recommending Vista Print. It’s a very good cheap option.
Good luck with your planning!
Post # 13
You don’t need save the dates at all, so no worrries. However, are you factoring in return postage for RSVPs? if so, have you considered online RSVP? My Fiance and I are having a rather large wedding and we are doing online RSVPs to prevent guests from adding on uninvited +1s, but they also have the added benefit of saving on return postage. The knot has a great user-friendly RSVP service that allows you to schedule multiple events (wedding, shower, bachelorette…family barbeque in ohio!) that require RSVP. When site visitors search their name, they will see a list of all the events they are invited to. As a bonus, you get to create a wedding website with more detailed explanations of the two events, which will save space on your invitations, and a lot of wasted time talking to each family member on the phone individually. For those relatives who are not tech savy, we are just providing a phone number.
As for sending out the invites early, don’t do it. I wouldn’t be concerned about the etiquette since your reasoning is correct, but I would worry about getting more than usual false positives. As PPs have mentioned, you’re more likely to get the most honest and accurate answer from your invited guests if you send the invites closer to the wedding. For some reason, guests feel less guilty backing out if they feel they RSVPed “ages” ago. Send out email Save-The-Date Cards.
Post # 14
I would email pretty Save-The-Date Cards through paperless post! Then print invites via vistaprint.