Ok so the wedding was 2 weeks ago now. I did email another website and got some useful info to share (leanna at leanna.com):
How tight should a waist feel? I use the term “snug” to describe to my brides how they should feel the waist. It needs to be secure enough so the boning has a good support to push up and hold the gown on you. “Snug” does not mean “tight”. Having the waist too tight will not make your day comfortable. You won’t be able to eat, dance, hug a loved one, or sit down with ease. Also, you do not want the gown to be “snug” or tight at the neckline. That could bite into your skin and create not-so-lovely bulges where you do not want them. Some brides will feel that the dress is too loose because the top is not tight. You might be feeling this. Have you tried sitting down in the gown? Every bride should test her fit seated.
Why is it seeming to slip? Warning, here comes a politically incorrect answer – Brides do NOT flap their arms up and down. You did not say but I am assuming that you are questioning this because the gown is strapless and maybe you have heard stories of brides boobs falling out of their dress, right? This is why you can not be pumping your arms up and down in a strapless gown. They are not designed for that function and if you fling your arms up enough you can pull your boob out. Boobs will not just fall out of a gown by themselves.
So, what do I do when I have to raise my arms for something like hugging my dear Aunt that I have not seen in years and she came all the way to see me get married? I tell my brides that when hugging a loved one at the reception, hug low. Let the loved one put their arms around your neck if they wish, but you hug waist level. When dancing, your hands can be above your head but do not let your elbows raise above your shoulder level. You can certainly do the normal ballroom embrace with your groom and father, but do not be doing the YMCA in a strapless wedding gown. Let your guests do the arm flapping over their heads. You dance your heart out as much as you wish – with your arms below your neck. Smile a lot and no one will ever notice you did not raise your arms above your head.
Will a wedding gown expand or shrink due to weather or the brides body heat? No. You may feel that it does because your body may swell or shrink during the course of this very busy day, but the dress will not.
Will the dress slip due to sweat? If it was fitted correctly, no.
Which brings me back to your original question of is it fitting correctly? I can’t tell you that for sure without seeing you in the dress. When with a bride, I watch how she is standing and fidgeting during a fitting to determine if she is truly comfortable in the fit or not. I do ask her questions but along with listening to her answers, I do more watching. If she is tugging at the top of the gown or constantly shifting her torso there is something wrong with the fit. She should be able to stand quietly and calmly while we are talking about other things like the hem or bustle. The bodice should look snug but not like it is cinching her in at any point, even the waist. If it has horizontal wrinkles it is too tight. There are many things I look for but the biggest thing is that he bride is questioning the fit. If she felt comfortable she would not question – SO – you are questioning the fit. Bottom line: I think your fit is not right for you.
So I went to my dress shop and they looked at it and said the dress was tight as they could get it so they put tape in around the bodice and back to help hold it more snugly.However on the big day I felt very snug and decided not to use it – even though the weather was very warm and I was sweaty. Plus my maid of honor did note that they stay was loose even on the tighest setting. Didnt seem to matter though. The dress was good all day although it did gap a little when I bent over at one point but that was my bad on my posture. I did a little dancing and was careful on my posture and moves as per the above and it was fine.