(Closed) How to address invite to Reverend

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 4
Member
1243 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

@MrsTimmy:  I believe that you would address the invite as follows:

The Reverend Jane Doe and Mr. John Doe

She would go first because she has an official title.

You should definitely find out her husband’s name.  As you are inviting her in her official capacity, I don’t think that there’s an issue with sending the mail to the church. If she and her husband live in the manse, I would send the mail to that address.

Post # 5
Member
7902 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

Mr. and the Reverend John Doe.

Just like you would do Mr. and Dr. John Doe is the wife has a doctorate.

I would mail it to the church.

Post # 7
Member
693 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

@MrsTimmy:  As a Minister my invitations from couples always come addressed to me as the first name and my husband as the 2nd since I’m Officiating the wedding like this:

Dr. Reverend Erica L. Thompson and Mr. Chris A. Thompson

Some people do it the other way because a “husband” is supposed to be the head of the house.

I would mail it to the church unless you have their home address. All of the invites are sent to my house only because I will lose them in my office at church with all of the paperwork I have going on- SERIOUSLY!

I file about 40 marriage licenses a week and it can get a bit crazy sorting contracts, event calendars, ML’s, rehearsal notifications, notes from Coordinators, Vendors etc.

 

Post # 11
Member
693 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

@MrsTimmy:  If the Church addresses her a certain way then I would follow that protocol. Each church has it’s own way of addressing their Pastor/Deacon/Reverend/Priest. I think on most church websites they like to include their “formal” titles so that way new or interested congregation members can see information about them if they have bios etc.

Dropping it off is a nice way to go I think! It makes it more personal and it gives you a chance to ask if they’d like to join for the reception, rehearsal dinner etc.

Personally on a side note- I’m just throwing this out there to brides- one of my biggest pet peeves is being told I’m not a part of the wedding party. I’m THE main part of the wedding party. I’m the one making it legal and making sure the wedding happens. Therefore- have some consideration for your Pastor/Officiant and don’t treat them like hired help. It’s extremely rude. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been dismissed by photographers, caterers, coordinators and even couples in a very abrupt manner and had it eat it at me all the way home like I was a maid or even a janitor. It hurts!

 

Post # 13
Member
693 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

@MrsTimmy:  Thanks! I did just that! You can find it here

I wish you the best of luck on your wedding!

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