Post # 1
One of my oldest and dearest friends is getting married next year and for her bachelorette party she wants to go to Vegas. I am a bridesmaid and have been planning on going but recently my husband was hospitalized for over a week (he is fine thank goodness!) but this is going to put a strain on us financially. Between the work we both missed along with the hospital bills (we have insurance but we hadn’t met our yearly deductible yet), I am concerned we may not be able to swing a trip to Vegas. I am concerned with how to approach my friend about this situation, I don’t want to count myself out of the trip but I also don’t want to just spring on her suddenly that I am unable to go. I am mostly concerned about her feelings and being disappointed that i might not be able to go. How would you approach this?
Post # 3
“I just want to give you a head’s up that I may not be able to afford the trip to Vegas. I am going to do everything I can to make that happen , but ____’s recent hospitalization has drained our finances. I don’t want you to dwell on this, because I am still hoping to be able to attend, but I didn’t want to spring this on you at the last minute.”
Post # 4
I would just let her know exactly what you told us, that you really hope to make it and aren’t ready to count yourself out yet, but you want to give her the heads up that you might have to miss the party because of your husband’s hospitalization. It’s better that she be in the loop from the beginning — that way she won’t feel like you’re randomly bailing out if you can’t go.
Post # 5
@julies1949: +1 to that great response. And better to let her know now rather than later. Plus, if she is one of your good friends, she may be disappointed but I’m sure she will understand!
Post # 6
@MrsDibs: i’m sure she will completely understand. she should.
hopefully she is not one of those brides who will be offended and expects their bm’s to go into debt just for her wedding activities.
Post # 7
Agree with everyone else. Openness and honesty are the best policies. A good friend will understand.