how to ask about getting a birthday proposal

posted 3 years ago in Proposals
Post # 16
10077 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

“Hey Bob, I want to get engaged on my birthday. Make it happen.”

Post # 17
903 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

ramengirl :  I did this on a vacation in Mexico.  We spent one of our nights arguing because I was upset about him not wanting to propose (we’d been together 5 years).

It eventually happened, unbeknownst to me he had been looking at rings and simply hadn’t found one he liked yet.  Hindsight is 20/20 and I wish I would have let it go a little more.

It will come at the right time 🙂 Enjoy your birthday!

Post # 18
702 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

I wouldn’t drop hints. A lot of guys want to choose when and how they propose and it’s super important to them…as much as we all think about waiting for the proposal and how exciting engagements are, a lot of guys have the same feelings about getting down on one knee. You never know–he might do it on his own. I was thinking for months how the day of my first half-marathon would be such an amazing day for him to propose, but didn’t say anything to him about it…and sure enough he had the same thought because that’s when he proposed. Talk time lines, understand each other’s expectations, but don’t try to take it away from him.

Post # 19
736 posts
Busy bee

Me personally, I wouldn’t want to feel like I “asked” for him to propose or have a handle in terms of when he does it. I feel like this is a gesture that the man is giving to you. Call me old fashioned but that’s just the way I see it. I’m all for talking timeline and being on the same page about the future, but when it comes to the actual proposal it really sucks the romance out of it to basically tell him when to do it… IMO. 

Post # 21
105 posts
Blushing bee

ramengirl :  maybe you could make a joke or drop a very subtle hint. Some men are very much into the romantic, surprise element to the actual proposal and might not appreciate a woman requesting a certain day/location. Remember, it’s a HUGE thing for men too, especially these days with social media making things so over the top. He may have his own ideas, and I would not ruin it by pressuring too much that it happen on a specific trip. 

My SO specifically said he’d never propose on a holiday or trip, too cliche for him. He’s also said the chivalrous surprise thing is important. That’s perfectly fine by me, I don’t want to know anything about the proposal, I know I’ll cry and be a complete mess so I try not to think about it.

Post # 22
497 posts
Helper bee

No hints pleeez. It’ll ruin the surprise.

Post # 24
317 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

ramengirl :  “Wouldn’t it be nice if I got a proposal on my birthday?”

That said, it may spoil the “surprise” element a little. I personally want to be surprised and for bf to pick the time on his own accord.

Post # 25
915 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

ramengirl :  That’s so exciting! It seems to me like he’s already showing you that he can take the initiative with the actual proposal so don’t stress about it. He will do it when he’s ready! 

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