(Closed) how to ask for money instead of gifts?

posted 10 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
492 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

It’s probably best not to write out anything at all.  Most people will bring a cash gift to a wedding because it’s the easiest gift to bring. 

If you ask for cash in lieu of gifts on the invite, website, wherever, it’s sort of like assuming they were going to get you a gift anyways, and instead of that gift you now want cash.

I would just sit back and let people do what they normally do.  If you only registered for a few items, odds are those will get bought up and a lot of people will just resort to cash gifts.

Post # 5
401 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

When they ask where you’re registered, you can say “We’re registered at Macy’s and saving for new furniture.” You can have your parents spread the same message when they are asked about registries. Most people will get the hint when they see a small registry.

Post # 6
1875 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

You don’t.  Lots of couples live together and/or have built up their own households.  I would just register for those things you need and leave it at that.  If you have a small registry, people will get the hint.  You can also spread by word of mouth that you are saving for something (HM, renovations, new furniture, etc.)  When someone askes you or your mom or Bridesmaid or Best Man or the family loud mouth, you/they can say that you are registered at X but are saving up for Y.  You can also let your artistic friends know you’d appreciate a piece of their work if they ask.


Also, it’s totally ok to put your registry infor on your wedding website. 

Post # 7
1490 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

You don’t.  Search old forums and you’ll find that no one thinks this is a good idea.  People will give you cash anyways but you don’t ask for it.

Post # 8
8941 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

We had it spread by word of mouth, didn’t have a shower and only registered for a few small things.  It worked pretty well, we didn’t get a lot of stuff at the wedding.

Post # 9
5050 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

In my expirience……if you have a registry….you get whats on it……if you have a wishing well and ask for money…..lots of people give you money but don’t wish you well……..if you ask for nothing…. people are stumped for ideas and you usually get money/cheques……safest bet is  do away with the few items you have on your regsitry…and you may just get cash.Laughing

Post # 10
1113 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I don’t know where you’re from but if you’re having a cultural wedding, most guests won’t get the hint to give you money from the minimal amount of gifts on the registry. If you really want money, I would register for Visa Gift Cards.

Post # 11
431 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Agree with Bees who say “You don’t.”

Don’t stress about it. Once your guests they see that you’ve registered for minimal items and/or that the registry is fulfilled, they’ll likely resort to cash or gift cards. It’s kind of a given in this day and age that many couples would prefer cash if their household is already established.

It’s great that you’d like to open up gift ideas to include the talents of friends and family; definitely have immediate family and wedding party members spread the word!

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