(Closed) How to ask guests not to post things on social networking sites…

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 17
Member
2965 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I was just thinking about this today! I want my wedding private as well. I will have the officiant ask that people turn off their phones (and dont forget about turning off the flash of the camera if at least you want them to do that) and cameras before the ceremony.

Post # 18
Member
5398 posts
Bee Keeper

I agree that you could try for a kindly worded sign or announcement, or word of mouth. But as a guest I would totally roll my eyes at this. Sorry just being honest. 

Post # 19
Member
3318 posts
Sugar bee

@MizzStark1026:  No.  There is no polite way to ask people to not post pictures.

They own the files and can post them where they like.

 

Post # 20
Member
3519 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

In my opinion, guest photos are a really cool way to tide you over until you get your professional pictures. Untag yourself if you don’t like a picture, or msg your friend to delete it.

Post # 21
Member
1991 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

We posted a sign at the guest book table not to take photos during the ceremony, and seriously nobody got their cameras out (which makes our pro pics look sooo much better). Maybe just post signs like that?

 

Post # 22
Member
2194 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

we went to a reception last year of SO’s friend. He is a professional football player, so security was an issue for them. They were married in Puerto Rico, so I don’t know how to announced this at the ceremony, but at the reception their DJ just politely reminded everyone to please not post pictures of the bride and groom on facebook or any other social media sites to preserve their privacy. I think a little note on the program might be a nice reminder as well.

Post # 23
Member
1776 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I am going to agree that there is not really a polite way to ask.  However, I was absolutely disagree that it is not a big deal or that because someone owns the files they should be able to post anywhere they like.  If it is a picture of YOU, you should have a say in whether or not it is posted.  My husband for example has a very strict employer and having pictures posting of him dancing funnily or drinking alcohol could severely hurt his career.  If people want to post pics of themselves, it is fine, but I think they need to be more aware of posting pictures of others (especially other people’s children).  Once something is on the internet, it’s out there, I don’t think a little respect is too much to ask.

Post # 24
Member
3175 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

View original reply
@pinkandsparkly:  I think it’s different when it’s a pro athlete. If you’re not in the spotlight, people will just think you’re full of yourself.

Post # 25
Member
2194 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

View original reply
@les105:  true, but if you really feel strongly about it, I dont think it matters if people feel that way. They’ll get over it. Its your wedding, do your thing!

Post # 26
Member
716 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I agree with PP… there’s no way to control this and I think it would be rude to ask them not to post their own pictures. Pictures the pro photog took? Yea, that’s a copywrite issue, but not photos they took with their own cameras.

Post # 27
Member
143 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

andielovesj:Technically, a random person doesn’t own the rights to use images they take at a private event, whether or not they own the files. If it got ugly, a bride and groom could sue someone for posting their photos without permission. 

Post # 28
Member
1212 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Agree with the pps about people not having the right to post pics of me. FBers get militant over their right to post frigging ANYTHING, but I personally feel strongly that they don’t have the right to override my privacy by posting pictures of me from a private event  for which I have not signed an image release. I’m not anyone important, but I am me, and I’m a very private person when it comes to not having my mood, my love for friends and my image all over FB.

 

And yes, I have gotten over myself.

Post # 29
Member
3885 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I think if the boundary is drawn at the wedding party, it’s a reasonable request. Hey guys, post all you want of each other, your hotel room, the venue, whatever, just don’t post the bride, groom or their party.

You can also set your Facebook settings so that you have to approve all images where you’re tagged. If you decline, the photo stays up, you’re just not tagged in it.

Post # 30
Member
343 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I’ve had the same thought as the OP about requesting no posting, or delaying it, but never realized that it might be considered impolite to ask.  Have to think about that!  I personally feel like I could make that request, but it might be futile – so much ends up on Facebook.  I will check my settings, though!  I do feel pretty strongly about no photos during the ceremony, so hopefully people will honor that.

Post # 31
Member
2481 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I don’t think it’s rude to ask your friends and family to refrain from posting pictures of the bride and groom or other guests on social media pages. It’s a matter of privacy. Also, as someone else mentioned, the wrong picture can easliy have a negative impact on someone’s career. If guests want to post photos of themselves, fine. But I don’t think it’s out of line to politely ask them to not post pictures of the bride and groom or other guests online. Nothing hoity-toity about it. Just a matter of respecting the bride’s and groom’s privacy. 

We are having a very small wedding (50 ish guests) because we are very private people. Neither of us has a Facebook or other social media account. Also, we both have ex’s who could easily access pics posted online of us and our wedding and we’re not comfortable with that. I have a unique name and I’m very easy to find online. I like to keep my online exposure to a minimum in order to maintain privacy and keep my ex’s in the past (where they belong). We will have the officant make an announcement at the start of the ceremony to that effect. 

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