How to cope with postponement of wedding?

posted 2 weeks ago in Emotional
Post # 16
Member
3844 posts
Honey bee

After reading your post, I was thinking you’re likely from Europe (or outside the US) and I was correct after glancing at your location. I’m from the US and some will not differentiate the civil vs the church (I’m not here to argue with anyone so don’t tell me otherwise). But my SO is European and after being exposed to his friends and attending numerous weddings in his country , I get what you mean when you say the church wedding is considered as the “real deal”. ALL of my SO’s friends refer to the church wedding date as their anniversary and not the civil one (the day they went to the government office to sign papers). 

Post # 17
Member
7627 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

KatzeB :  

 

I see this is important But we are meant to consider the church wedding as the real deal”  but no matter how you ‘consider’ it , you are already legally married.  However , you say that you are abstaining from consummation until the church   ceremony so I would  think you could get your marriage  l  anulled on those grounds if you want to ? 

I don’t know   if there is a time limit  on these things, if not , then you don’t   really need to do anything  but wait and see how  the therapy etc goes . If there is a time  limit then , obviously  you have to make a decision sooner . I think legal advice asap  is in order.

Meanwhile ,  don’t feel you have to share details or explain yourselves  to  anybody unless you really , really want them to know.  Practice some  anodyne, off putting phrases to answer any intrusive questions . 

Post # 19
Member
7627 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

KatzeB :  

Thank you , what a kind response and from someone  who is in such a hard place too.

Keep us in the loop, here is anonymous and a good place to practice and  sound  out ideas .

Thinking of you .  

Post # 21
Member
10 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2008

Sorry. Good luck 👍🏼

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