(Closed) How to drop Bridesmaids

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
6661 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

Wow, you need to crack the whip a little harder!! I gave my BM’s a fake, made-up deadline so they would order in time and it totally worked. As DB if they can rush ship the dresses and tell your BM’s they better order TODAY or else they won’t have a dress!!

Post # 5
Hostess
18644 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I agree about cracking the whip.  Either way, I doubt that you can replace them in time with the deadline.  I’m sorry you are having problems with them!

Post # 7
Member
221 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I did the same with the deadline. Maybe they don’t realize how long the dresses take to be ordered? You should probably tell them it needs to be done ASAP if you haven’t already.

Post # 8
Member
928 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Wow, that’s just really …ugh…crappy…of your BMs and waaaaaay disrespectful. You need to light a little fire under their butts or they can just not be in it since obviously it’s too much for them to buy their dress.

Is there a way you can work something out with David’s? When I bought my Bridesmaid or Best Man gown from them I paid in full so I dont know how this works but can you put down a very, very small deposit for each of them so it can be ordered? This saying, they will STILL pay for it in full themselves, including paying you back. Would that work? I wouldn’t have them order from somewhere else, not because they’re too lazy and at the expense of what you want. Maybe you need to treat them like children and physically make them go down there with you and order it in front of you. Man, I”d be pissed!

Post # 9
Member
1638 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

At this point do you still want them in your wedding? It seems like they are maybe ignoring your deadline so you’ll remove them? That is what my Ex Bridesmaid or Best Man did. I couldn’t get her on the phone so a friend helped me craft a message that sounded very neutral and business like, something like this:

Dear Bridesmaid or Best Man,

As you know from my previous messages the dresses had to be ordered by X. That time has since passed. I understand for one reason or another you couldn’t make it to the dress shop. The order had to be placed because of the time it takes for them to arrive, sadly this means you will no longer be in the wedding party. I hope you will still be able to attend the wedding.

Sincerely,

Bride

It wasn’t that exactly but that was the theme of it. I got a msg back 4 days later saying sorry I forgot and of course I’ll still come. I think ex Bridesmaid or Best Man didn’t order it not b/c she forgot but just because she didn’t really want to be in the wedding. All my other Bridesmaid or Best Man were so excited to get the dresses/be in the wedding and when I had a stragler I knew it was b/c she wasn’t excited to be in it and kept making excuses.

So I guess everything depends on what YOU want. Do you think they will pay the $35 for overnight shipping?

Post # 11
Member
15 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I took mine in and let them pick out the dresses they liked then I paid for them. They have been in since the end of february. I dont have to worry about their dresses now. Mine just can’t seem to get to a tailor and get theirs hemmed up.

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