(Closed) How to emphased that relatives are univited?

posted 4 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
4442 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2013 - Harbourfront Grand Hall

@Lady_in_White:  How is the rest of your bridal party getting to the reception from the ceremony?


I would make arrangements for your cousin with whoever else is in your party so this problem can be skipped entirely.


Does your venue have security at all?  If so I would let them know of the potential problem.

Post # 4
56 posts
Worker bee

Is it possible to ask someone from the bridal party to pick up your cousin?

Also I would talk to the cousin maybe throw a subtle hint like if your parents have any question re grandma let me know and i`ll ask dad .. something of the sort so that maybe you can confirm that they are going to be looking after your grandmother.

Post # 5
3724 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

If she’s in her 30s and is fairly independent from her family, why is she dependent on them for transportation? Have your invitations gone out? That should be a clear sign to them that they weren’t invited.

Post # 6
474 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@Lady_in_White:  does your cousin know they are not invited? Depending on how close you are, maybe honesty is the best.. i.e. Hey just want to remind you your family is not invited… I can help with a ride for you to avoid any “weirdness” for you by having them drop you off and leave…

Post # 7
529 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

Hi there, I’m so sorry that you have to deal with this.  I would see if one of your other bridesmaids can help her out with transportation to all the events.  You could say something like, “No problem!  There’s no need to have your family come all the way down here just to give you a ride.  Bridesmaid X has room in her car for you.”  

Also, I want to caution you to try your best not to get involved with the family fight, and to try your hardest to not let this drama ruin your wedding day.  At the core of it, this day is about YOU and your special day with your husband.  Your focus should be on that.  If your uncle shows up uninvited, ignore it.  Dance with your husband.  Dance with your friends.  SMILE.  

If your dad leaves your wedding because your uncle shows up, then shame on him.  I hope that he would know better than to leave his daughter’s wedding over that.  Hopefully, your dad can be the bigger man in the situation and put the disagreement on the back-burner for the day, and realize that his presence at your wedding is more important than a fight with your uncle, and potentially ruining his daughter’s wedding day.    

Finally, this fight has nothing to do with your cousin.  Please don’t take it out her.    

Post # 8
859 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2018

I would find some way to get or give her a ride.  I suggest you ask your father and sister to inform you if they see your uncle so that you can ask him to leave and if you have to call security to make him leave.

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