(Closed) How to explain to FI when to start planning??

posted 8 years ago in Reception
Post # 3
6394 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

I showed Fiance a couple magazines that tell you to plan 12 months ahead of time :). It got the point across. Seriously, how do girls just know this stuff and boys are so clueless about everything wedding related? Do they just zone out and assume they’ll never get married or what? :P.

Post # 5
4001 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Oh gosh, he’s clueless!  ๐Ÿ™‚

We had a 1.5 year engagement and I started research before the proposal.  My husband (FI at the time) didn’t have a problem with me going full throttle early on but he did ask why.  I explained to him that I wanted to find the best options at the best prices.  Sometimes if you book in advance, you can save money.  If you do research early on, you can avoid problems closer to the day of the wedding.  Tell him this is normal.  This is what brides-to-be do! 

Post # 6
652 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Is he in agreement with the date?  Because if he is, then he should know that 9 months is pretty good time to start nailing details like ceremony and reception location down.  And before you do that you definitely need to set a budget.  If you wait until 2011, you will be paying 2011 prices–every vendor I’ve worked with so far has agreed to stay at 2010 pricing in the contract.  So that’s a savings of money.  Another good reason to start planning?  Because you, his Fiance, need that piece of mind.  Not everyone can be comfortable planning a wedding in 3 months.  

Post # 7
3219 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

You need to start planning ASAP! thoes 9 months are going to go FAST.

Post # 8
1150 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

men just don’t understand how well women can multitask! We can buy an house, get a promotion and plan a wedding all in the same year ๐Ÿ˜›

Post # 9
339 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Have him go with you to a couple of venue options that you both like and then ask them their availability.  That shocked my Fiance into realizing how quickly everything books up ๐Ÿ™‚ 

We went to our ceremony venue in May 2010 and they were booked for every single Saturday night during summer of 2011.  After doing a little bit of wedding stuff, he’ll quickly catch on.

Happy planning and good luck!

Post # 10
2201 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Just tell him that you don’t want to be a crazy mess and be so “over” the wedding by the time it gets here that you aren’t even excited. And that by slowly tackling the big items starting now, you’ll both be more relaxed and prepared for last-minute disasters.

And the best vendors get booked a year out.

Post # 11
527 posts
Busy bee

I got my Fiance a book called “The Groom’s Instruction Manual.”  It is funny, written by a man, and full of graphs and other visual aides.  This has been helping a lot with the eye rolling and exclamations of “We have to do what?!  Why?!”

Post # 12
638 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

Ah, boys are so clueless about how much work planning is and how long it takes. ๐Ÿ™‚ My Fiance thought that we would need about a month to find all the vendors and then we could just finish all the details the week before the wedding. My solution to this was to show him a checklist as well. At first he thought that he wanted to be in charge of planning the whole reception, then he saw the list and changed his tune.

So, like some of the other ladies, I would show him a checklist. Gets the point across pretty well.

Post # 14
2103 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

Yes! My fiance doesn’t seem to understand why I want to start looking at venues in December! Even though we’re not getting married until 2012, it still takes a long time to get stuff together, especially since we’re in a LDR and planning from out of state and on top of that, full-time students and teachers.

Good tips, though. I’m definitely going to show him the checklist. I don’t think a lot of men (and people, in general) understand what goes into planning a wedding. I think he thinks it’s: dress, tux, cake, done! lol

Post # 15
18643 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

You really need to start planning now.  A lot of June locations and vendors can book out more than a year in advance.

Post # 16
69 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

Thank you for starting this thread! I have problems getting my Fiance to understand that we should have had a lot of stuff already set and our wedding is in February!

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