(Closed) how to explain to my parents we’re moving in together

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
4137 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

just tell them! it’s your decision, not theirs.

Post # 4
Member
194 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

i agree. if you are old enough to be engaged, you are old enough to make decisions for yourself. Plus, it’s 2010, and people usually live together before marriage anyways. It saves on bills too! ha

Post # 5
Member
200 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

DO they pay your bills? Are they super conservative/religous? Have they expressly stated that they would disapprove of you doing this?

If the answers are “No” to all of this, it might not be as big a deal as you think. When I told my parents, which I was very nervous about, they were like, “well, you’re and adult, you pay your bills, and frankly you’re young enough that we’re just glad you aren’t getting married yet” I was both shocked, pleased and offended. Give your parents some credit. They might be cooler than you think!

Post # 6
Member
301 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I had a hard time telling my parents! But I had also just turned 18. They way it got to them was that I was always at his house til the late hours of the night (2-3am) or some nights I would stay the night. I slowly made my collection and eventually had my own wordrobe at his place. My parents kinda figured it out lol.

But I would just let them know. Most people are already living together before they get married anyways. It will help you get to know him better and his habits as well as him with yours.

Post # 8
Member
893 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Can you afford all of those bills without your parents contributing?

Post # 10
Member
893 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I suggest that you two make a budget first and make sure you can afford all of your bills if your parents get upset and/or cut you off financially.

40k plus some additional income from your job sounds like a lot, but the money goes quickly once you factor in all of your expenses.

There are budget worksheets online that can help, see what Google pulls up.

Post # 11
Member
200 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

WEll, thats a different story. People who pay your bills get a say in how you spend their money, so you have to be ready to step up if they threaten to cut of their funds if you do this. Which, if they disapprove, is probably the first thing they’ll do.

I think that you need to sit down with them and let them know that you appreciate all the help they have been giving you, and that, as an adult, you want to take steps to be more independant, both in your living arrangements and your lifestyle. Let them know that your relationship is serious and you want to take the next step. ANd let them know that to you, that is living together and pursuing your relationship.

And from there, you know better than I what will com next, whether that is a yelling freak out, or crying, or calm. Good luck!

 

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