I want to say that 35 is really not very old. You are still young. Some people meet their partners later in life, so try not to see the fact that you haven’t met your “One” yet as a failure. Marriages after the age of 30 have a higher chance of success, and all of the life and relationship experience you have gone through should serve you well when choosing a partner.
That said, I think the biggest thing that needs to change, from reading your post/s, is your attitude. You are so keen to give up on things because they don’t deliver the results you want right when you expect them to. I picked up so many self-defeating comments in your posts, and I guarantee you these are what are causing your low success rates. You join a dating site and then notice how the good quality guys are “snatched up.” Well guess what? This is how dating sites work. You stick it out, because if one or two guys leave the site, another one will be along in half an hour. It’s a numbers game. Also, guys aren’t messaging you? Well then you message them! Send them a quick message expressing interest in something in their profile. You have literally nothing to lose.
And what’s with this taking it so personally that guys are looking at your profile but not contacting you? There could be a hundred different reasons for this. These guys don’t know you at all, so you cannot feel rejected by this. You need a MUCH thicker skin than this for online dating and stop taking it all so personally, because it isn’t. If you contact a guy and he doesn’t get back to you, or if you have one date with a guy and don’t hear from him again, your attitude should be “Oh well, moving on.” There are plenty more fish in the sea, even in your 30s, I can promise you. Try not to get so hung up on it all; that is the beauty of online dating. If one guy doesn’t pan out, there are always others.
And try dating apps like Tinder and Bumble. I have met some lovely guys on there (I am 36). The guy I am dating now is someone I met on Tinder. There are many couples in my social circle who met their partners on one of these apps – a few of them are married now. Be very discerning about who you talk to and go out with – only guys who are relationship oriented with no obvious red flags – but it’s a great way to meet lots of guys. Again, just have a very “what happens, happens” attitude towards it and don’t take it too personally. You will kill yourself if you take online dating/dating app dating too seriously, and there is no need for that. It’s just a fun and easy way to meet people, and your self-esteem should not be wrapped up in it.
Give things more of a chance and don’t give up so easily – persevere with online dating, dating apps, meet-ups, parties, hobby clubs (like hiking/photography clubs etc.), coffee shops… anywhere you like to go. Just keep putting yourself out there. Guys will show up, it’s the law of numbers.
Learn how to flirt and be a bit more obvious about your interest in guys (without overdoing it). If there’s a guy you like, be playful – touch his arm, compliment him, drop hints about something you’d like to go to that you think he might like, look into his eyes and smile, put the effort in with your appearance… it’s really very easy when you practice.
Finally, learn how to really love the life you’ve got outside of a relationship. Have interests, hobbies and friends so that you have something to talk about on dates and can be a great conversationalist. Nothing is more attractive than someone who loves their own life and is comfortable and happy in their own skin.