(Closed) How to fire a bridesmaid?

posted 7 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 2
9565 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2015

Well really, how could her enthusiasm not wane after a 3 year engagement. But regardless, I would leave that part out of it and just blame the finances. It sounds like she doesn’t care about being a Bridesmaid or Best Man anyway so she’ll likely appreciate the out.

Post # 3
1298 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

You can’t fire her because being a bridesmaid is a role and not a job unless of course you are paying her which I assume you are not. 

What you can do however is have a discussion with her and ask her if she really wants to be a bridesmaid or not because it doesn’t sound like she does from your point of view. she could very well make the decision to step down herself. 

Post # 4
6515 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

View original reply
Dogmummy:  I am sorry, but what has she done wrong? What do you expect of your bridesmaid? 


Post # 5
3576 posts
Sugar bee

Have you talked to her about it? Tell her how you feel before you go throwing her out the wedding. If she says she doesn’t want to be  a Bridesmaid or Best Man than fine she is out.  I get how frustrating it is but what if she does have every intention of being a Bridesmaid or Best Man and is just real busy? Maybe ask her how she i doing instead of talking about the wedding and see if she responds.

Post # 6
825 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: Local Resort

Just tell her your plans have changed, and that she doesn’t need to be a bridesmaid any more.  Call her with “GREAT” news! and tell her you’ve found a way for her to get out of all this “mess”.  Fall on the sword, and give her the out.  She’ll appreciate it.

Post # 7
8570 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

If she’s avoiding all appointments and things, then it sounds like she may not even be interested anymore. I would simply ask her straight out if she wanted to be a bridesmaid still [or ask her again since the last time was 2 years ago? That’s a long time!]. She might not be interested anymore.

Post # 9
4350 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

View original reply
Dogmummy:  I would definitely just have a discussion with her and tell her that you are giving her an out with no hard feelings. Emphasise the distance between you and the costs/finances of her being a bridesmaid. Tell her you would love to have her there as a guest!

Post # 10
11 posts
  • Wedding: December 2014

I think you should tell her that you unfortunately can not afford to pay for all of the expenses for her to attend. I don’t think it’s fair that you are paying for her entire trip, hair, and dress and she can’t even humor you when discussING yyour wedding. A lot of people seem to think that a bridesmaid is supposed to just stand up next to you when you get married however they have roles to play. The role may differ between weddings however one of the major roles is to be a support person and she doesn’t seem to be that for you. I think you should nicely I’m form her that you can’t afford the expenses and if she wants to be apart of the wedding she will have to pitch in. That way you will be able to also have your sister in law.

Post # 11
1288 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015


View original reply
Dogmummy:  I agree with PP. Tell her you can’t afford to pay for everything for her. Its not fair to you to be catering to someone else when its YOUR day. If she says anything about not being able to be in the wedding, then go with it.

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