(Closed) How to give back to a super generous friend at my shower

posted 4 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 2
5992 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 2017

Buy her a trip to the spa for some r&r. Get her some lovely treatments with a nice lunch and write her a lovely thank you note to go along with it.

Post # 3
7635 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

First I want to say that, after reading so many stories of bad or difficult friends on this site, it was so heartwarming to read about your friend and I began tearing up.

Anyway, I get the impression that she’s somewhat older than you and isn’t a bridesmaid. You could honour her by having her do a reading at your wedding. I did that with an older female friend at my wedding. (Or, do what the first poster said).

Post # 4
1822 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2017

Some people just really love to give and to be generous! Buying her a trip to a spa is a nice idea, or else a cookery workshop if she likes that kind of thing, or some other experience she likes. I would try again to invite her for dinner. But at the end of the day, if she doesn’t want anything, a card is adequate too ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 5
180 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

This was such a lovely post to read.  I don’t think you should feel bad at all, your friend sounds like a truly kind natured person and we could all do with one of those in our lives ๐Ÿ™‚

I would send the thank you card but also write a letter to say how much you appreciate her, you don’t have to list everything but say that her generosity and friendship are things that you are truly grateful for.

The idea of having her do a reading or getting a gift are absolutely lovely but don’t feel obliged, she sounds like the type of person that would hate the thought of you worrying about these things! 

Post # 6
484 posts
Helper bee

What a lovely women. It sounds like she is the type of person for whom the thought counts, rather than one who is worried about the cost of gifts. So I think a thank you card with a heartful message about what a kind and giving friend she is would be perfect. 

Post # 7
3422 posts
Sugar bee

View original reply
littlecats :  She has previously included her daughter in the picnic she organized for you, and it seems you really enjoyed it. With that in mind, is there a hotel or restaurant near you that offers high tea? If all of you like tea, I would invite them to high tea, with all the works: fine china, silverware, those divine sandwiches, flowers, etc. 

Post # 8
1566 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2017

View original reply
littlecats :  Oh my goodness this is so sweet!


You’ve had some great suggestions provided by PPs here! Spa retreat, ladies’ high tea (I’m a fan), and asking her to do a reading! If it were me, and you had room for it – I think asking her to do a reading at your wedding and honoring her that way is a great idea, given she’s a long time family friend. I’d also want to gift her an experience like the high tea! 


One other suggestion to throw into the hat – can you offer her and her spouse/partner a date night? Get them a gift card to a restaurant or a movie, and offer to watch her daughter? Very thoughtful and considerate of you you be asking this Bee ๐Ÿ˜Š

Post # 9
1697 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

Your friend sounds lovely!! Yes, like PP said, what a breath of fresh air after all the stories on the Bee! Your friends sound a lot like mine ๐Ÿ™‚ I would suggest giving a reasonable gift in your price range (from a friendship bracelet to an Etsy pair of earrings to flowers) that’s personal to say thank you, along with a hand written card! Your friend sounds like she shows her affection openly by gifts. What does your friend love? For example, if she values quality time, treating her to brunch may be the nicest gift. Regardless of how you thank her, I think she will appreciate you showing her how much you care and telling we how important she is to you. I hope you ladies are friends for a very long time ๐Ÿ˜

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