Post # 1
A now former longtime friend of mine had become a major source of constant drama in my life ranging from stashing drugs in the car I was driving to being involved with a married man to demanding I be at her constant beck and call with little in return from her. She also has a complete gutter mouth and constantly makes obscene jokes with everyone she knows for shock value. One time she shot my boyfriend a series of dirty jokes, and being the banterer he is and knowing well who she is, he shot one back. She then came to me telling me he wants her and I shouldn’t trust him (after 3+ years of being together with no cause for concern). I actually posted specifically about the text exchange a few months back and got some great advice from the bees.
I met up with her for coffee and explained why what she was doing was stressing me out and making me want to pull away. She said she understood, then started crying and saying she had been in a bad place, and that she would work on things. She also said she understood that everything in the texts had all just been jokes and banter and that she knows my boyfriend is madly in love with me. But then no less than a couple weeks later she sent me a scathing 10-page email while I was on a trip with my boyfriend, knowing full well where I was. The letter was chock full of distorted recollections at best and outright fabrications at worst, but the general overarching theme was why I’m the worst human she’s ever known, how I’m the reason she even does drugs in the first place, and wishing unspeakably awful things on me. I was stunned but ultimately decided it was better not to satisfy her with a response, and I officially cut the cord right then and there (only wish I done so much much sooner).
Months went by, and I thought she had forgotten about me and moved on with her life like I had. But then she started sending me texts. So I blocked her number. Then she began liking and unliking every photo I had ever posted of me & my boyfriend dating all the way back to when we first got together. Then just today I received yet another manifesto this time focused entirely on my boyfriend. She said she had lied to me when she said her exchange with him had all been a joke as a last-ditch effort to save what was left of our friendship, saying my boyfriend wanted to f*ck her and is definitely going to cheat on me if he hasn’t already. She said she’s going to make me sorry I “ditched her for him” and has all the texts still saved.
She went on to tell me to watch my back and that she is also going to involve my mom somehow. Normally I would just ignore all this again, but I’m the type of person that the minute anyone so much as mentions my family, all bets are off. I don’t want to be extreme, but I honestly don’t know at what point she will just stop already and leave me alone, as it’s been close to a year since all this initially happened, and she is starting to creep me out a little. I tried my best to stay above it all and haven’t spoken an ill word about her to any of our mutual friends, but I honestly don’t know how to handle the situation anymore. Why is she still actively trying to ruin my life?! And what should I do?
Post # 2
caligirl3: She’s nuts. Block her from your email and continue to ignore her.
Post # 3
Go to the police and tell them everything. File a report. Let her know that you have reported everything and Will file a restraining order. She is mentally sick and could get dangerous in the future. Don’t respond to anything else she tells you//sends you in the future. Do not get emotional about anything she does. It will take time and strength but she has to know that whatever she does you do not care about . Block her on everything. Good luck.
Post # 4
I would take both emails and any proof of further contact and ask the police for a temporary restraining order. She has to know that harassing you is not acceptable.
Post # 5
To follow up, what is most concerning is its escalating. She clearly won’t stop until she gets a reaction, which is why you should get the authorities involved now rather than later.
Post # 6
- Wedding: April 2017 - City, State
Report it to your local police department and keep a record of all her threats and communication. They may not be able to do anything about the situation right now, but having a record of her threats will be helpful. As for what to do, ask the police how you should handle her. I imagine that they’d tell you not to respond to her at this time.
Post # 7
Yeah, you need to document this stuff. You might not have enough for a TRO now, but keep a record of every time that she makes contact, and do not ever respond to her. Unfortunately, it sounds like she has become quite unhinged.
Post # 8
if shes threatening you then go to the police, keep the message and have the police record a record of the harasment they may tell her to cease all contact and if she breaks that then the police can intervene and get a restraining order etc…
Post # 10
- Wedding: May 2017 - Canvas Event Space
Do you know if she’s contacted any of your mutual friends like this? Has anyone else said anything about her weird behaviour? You don’t have to speak ill about her to anyone, but definitely bring it up to them. Maybe they’ve started seeing signs, too.
Do you have any way to contact anyone in her family and let them know they might need to be concerned about her? If she’s had drugs problems in the past, maybe they’ve gotten worse and they can do something to help her. I’m sure they know about it, but they might not know about this kind of behaviour which is very alarming.
If she’s sending threats, save everything and I agree with others – I don’t think it’s a bad idea to put it on record with the police.
Post # 11
It might be a bit extreme but once she starts threatening you and your fmaily you need to document and get a restraining order.
Post # 12
caligirl3: definitely file a police report. She is harassing and threatening you
Post # 13
I think it might be time for a restraining order. You don’t want to get involved with her and her attempts at sabotaging your relationships with SO and family.
Post # 14
Restraining order as she is threatening yiur family.
Post # 15
I think that you should definitely consider getting the police involved. I’m sorry, she sounds like a terrible person.