Post # 1
So, I am hoping someone else has had this issue and if so, please help!
I am getting married in less than a month at a pretty fancy beach front place, which has a dress code we are responsible for ensuring our guests abide by. I have had several people inquire as to what they should wear at the wedding and have a feeling some people are going to come in jeans and flip flops, thinking this is a ‘beach’ wedding.
We also have a few people on our guest list who I have a feeling won’t make an effort to wear anything beyond flip flops and a skirt or something.
Any recommendations as to how to handle? Do I ignore and hope for the best or say something to everyone now?
Post # 3
Maybe tell them country club dress code? Did you specify on the invitations the dress code?
Post # 4
I would maybe include a little insert with the invitation with the dress code. I got one like that for a very fancy wedding once
Post # 5
If you’re getting married in less than a month, I assume the invites already went out? You probably should have included “Formal Attire Required” on the invite. At this point, you need to contact people to make sure they know, as probably some will assume it’s more casual (I probably would, unless I specifically knew the venue).
Post # 6
Invitations have gone out already and I did not specify. I probably made a boo boo by assuming people would know how to dress. I just honestly didn’t think of it until people started asking. In retrospect, I would have put something.
Great suggestion, sooner365. Country club attire is a great way to describe it!
Post # 7
Thank you:) It was the 1st thing that popped in my mind. Do you have time to send out a letter of some sort explaining this? Or email?
Post # 8
I personally have no idea what country club attire is. You play golf at a country club, right? I don’t think you want people showing up in polo shirts, so I’d be careful to use that phrasing. Honestly, at this point, I think its too late. I think “semi-formal attire requested” would have been okay on the invitations, but I’d honestly be annoyed if I got a letter or an email telling me how to dress after the fact. If anything, I’d spread the news through word of mouth to those you think might be inclined to wear jeans (although, I assume that would be few people since most people know how to dress for a wedding, beach or not).
Post # 9
Op: I think you dropped the ball on when you could of specified and now I think you can’t really get away with it.
Fingers crossed that everyone will gussy themselves up for you and your FH 🙂
Post # 10
Country club attire is no jeans and no flip flops. I would have put something on the invite, but you can still put dress info on your website and ask some friends/ fam to help spread the dress code by word of mouth.
Post # 11
If your invitations were not already sent, I would recommend simply putting “Dress Code” or “Semi-formal Dress” in the lower right corner. So doing does violate the standards of old-fashioned etiquette, but even Royal wedding invitations have bowed to the necessity since the 1950’s.
Since your invitations are already out, you can probably just assume that your sophisticated guests will know how to dress for a wedding, and the parvenues will ask — which seems to be what is happening. Anyone who does get turned away for wearing jeans or flip-flops to a wedding, really has earned their discomfiture themselves. If it happens, let them know you’ll keep a plate warm for them while they go home and change.
Post # 12
In general, just assume that most people do not have common sense. Even though it may feel weird I would just tell people what the dress code is. I really did not want kids at my wedding but my Fiance insisted so I caved and let his aunt bring her 10 year old. The kid was wearing jeans and a sweatshirt. My wedding was at a country club that obviously required formal attire. GRRR
Post # 13
At this point, since invites have already been sent, you have to either bite the bullet and let people come how they will, or start making phone calls! Good luck!
Post # 14
If I were you I would make phone calls to everyone, letting them know that you forgot to specify the attire requirements on the invites and you wanted to make sure that they wouldn’t have any problems at the venue.
Post # 15
Get your bridesmaids and groomsmen to spread the word to anyone that asks, or maybe doesn’t ask, and the same for your parents.
Post # 16
Ignore, guests can wear what they want, especially to the beach.