- 9 years ago
- Wedding: July 2015
So I’m not a wedding etiquette expert at all but I am having a bit of a dilemma.
The thing is, my family has a lot of kids, and so does my fiance’s family–with most being under the age of 12.
We decided to nix kids due to wanting our friends to be able to celebrate with us (no one under the age of 16 unless it’s a flower girl, ringbearer, etc), but this leaves us in a tight spot with two families in my extended family.
The first is my step-cousin and her kids. She has four, but only two would be invited (they’re my age and my sister’s age, over 20). Of the other two, one is a boy (he’s 12) and does not care at all if he’s not invited, while the other is a girl (10) who not only has down’s syndrome, but is really spoiled and tends to hit and kick other children as well as say mean things like "I want you to die!" The thing is, I really don’t think her mom would have a problem with finding a sitter except her older sister (my age one) is usually her sitter, and she is kind of aggressive towards other people–I don’t want her older sis to miss out on my wedding!
The second (and worst) is my aunt. Her children are 16 and 14, but the 16 year old will be a bridesmaid. The 14 year old boy is a horror, and I mean it. He steals electronics and money from ANYONE, he’s rude, he has no manners nor respect for anyone. He has treated my fiance and I like crap for the last 4 years, and was the biggest reason that I’m having a kid-free wedding!
Now, you may wonder why this is a problem–my aunt FLIPPED OUT. She favors him and always has, so she is wondering why her precious little boy isn’t invited and thinks it’s a terrible decision (and had the distaste to tell my mom so… everyone in our family knows what a horror he is!). My sister told me just because it’s the kind of thing we find funny, and God knows I laughed about it at first, but now I’m a little worried that 1) my aunt will not let her daughter be a bridesmaid or 2) she will refuse to show up/blow up at me about it. She’s not a level-headed normal thinking person so it would be totally like her.
So now, do I just allow kids (and expand the guest list by at least 35?!?) or do I stick to my guns? I want to, but I also want my cousin to be a bridesmaid, I know it means a lot to her… and I want my other cousin to show up! Am I overreacting?!? (Sorry, having a little freak out over all this)