(Closed) How to handle this – I didn't invite them…

posted 4 years ago in Guests
Post # 2
9437 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

Some people are just gift givers. You don’t have to send them an invite just because they sent a gift, just send a thank you card.

Post # 3
3057 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

You aren’t required to invite them but if you get a lot of ‘nos’ you might. I heartfelt thank you his all that you are required to send. You might let your mom know in case she told them they were invited.

Post # 4
420 posts
Helper bee

Like PP, I would just send a thank you card.

Post # 5
595 posts
Busy bee

I just saw a thread on another site about people receiving gifts from people who aren’t invited to the wedding. I guess it’s acrually common, some people just like to give. It doesn’t mean you have to invite them. 

Post # 6
1747 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2017

I got gifts from various people who weren’t invited,they’re just generous people! I sent them a nice thank you card.

Post # 8
4509 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

If you have no space to accommodate them, you have no space.  Send a nice thank you note to your friends parents for the gift and directly explain to your friend that while you would be happy to invite her parents you are unable to due to, space, budget, whatever the reason.

Last year I gifted a couple who I had once been really close to but had since grown apart a wedding gift. I did this without any expectation of an invite but because I wanted to.

Post # 10
3292 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

She was just being nice. Some people are like that. 🙂 I highly doubt she expects to be invited. Just send her a thank-you note.

Post # 11
3444 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

We actually got quite a few gifts from people who weren’t invited (i.e., distant relatives like my dad’s aunt, friends of DH’s parents who we had never met living overseas), and I don’t think any of them expected an invite, or even would have travelled for the wedding if they had been. Some people are just generous! Just send a nice thank you card 🙂 

Post # 12
982 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 1984

When my kids were little I had a “mother’s helper” – actually a 14 year old neighbour. When she was getting married we were not invited and didn’t expect an invite but we definitely wanted to send her a gift so that she knew we were thinking of her on her wedding day. So, no, you shouldn’t feel obligated to invite them.

Also, I just saw your update re being asked to invite them (which I think is very inappropriate of your friend to do btw) and I would just explain to her that you cannot accomodate any more guests – reasons could include that your venue limits the number of guests allowed or that you’ve already given your final confirmation of guests to the caterer and it’s too late, etc.

Post # 14
3274 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

View original reply
oneinamillion :  a friend of my mum, who I reluctantly put on the list, asked if her daughter and partner could come to ours. Like wtf?!?

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