(Closed) How to invite someone who wasn’t on the initial guest list?

posted 12 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
1064 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

How honest can you be with them? I last minute invited one of my mom’s friend, she did the calling and we literally told her we just want her to come and have a good time and that she’s a seat filler and to bring a date. This way it made it clear nothing was expected in return.

Post # 5
1882 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Humm….this happend to my sister. THe couple called and said they ahd last minute cancellations and would love for her and hubby to go and not to bring anything except themselves. My sister thought is was hysterical and they went and had a great time.

Post # 6
6571 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2010

that happened to my friend with her roommates in college too. she explained that it’s a small wedding so she was unable to send their invites right away, however she was glad that people declined because now she is able to invite them and hopes that they will come. they called her up right when they got the email and said that they were getting their flights!

Post # 7
1765 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

I suggest what flamingred and artbee said: be honest to the point that you weren’t able to invite them before when you really wanted to, but since you are able now you would love for them to attend if they can–and not to bring anything but themselves!

Post # 9
65 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2008

How close are you to the wedding?  Some people don’t notice these things anyway- and really, some people do send invites out very close to the wedding (or am I on a lot of B lists???).  Does she know any people who already got invites?  If not, I say send it out- maybe include a little handwritten note saying how much you;’d like her to come.  If she knows other people who got their invites a month ago, you may need to go with the honest route.  And- before you send- make sure you’re ok on the guest ocunt!  You won’t believe how many people send their RSVPs in late!!

Post # 10
327 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2000

I would think that a lot of people have an understanding of the economy and huge expense of a wedding, and thus would understand having an A list and a B list. I think honesty is the best policy and would follow a similar script as those above have posted.

I’d be delighted, if it were me, and wouldn’t care about how/when I got invited.

Post # 11
7172 posts
Busy Beekeeper

Can you just send them an invite ASAP?  Maybe with a phone call to let them know it’s coming and sorry for the late notice?  

Post # 12
62 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: January 2010

I just sent them an invite and pretended like it wasn’t late. I don’t think they really noticed.


We also invited about 200 and are now expecting about 100. Sucks because our minimum is 150 X( Only about 30 have responded so far, so we’ll see what happens.

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