(Closed) How to let your potential bridesmaids know it is ok to decline

posted 5 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
4192 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

I would talk to everyone in person, or at least on the phone- I’ve seen too many cases where texts/letters can get misunderstood.

Or if you already feel that it’s going to be too much, why not just make them honorary BMs? If your Fiance is having a smaller number of GMs, you can use that as a reason.

Post # 4
739 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I just told my best friend, as I was asking her if she’d like to be my Maid/Matron of Honor, that I know it’s an expense and a time commitment and I sincerely would not be offended or have hurt feelings if she declined. All you can really do is be open & honest with your friends and trust them to have the courage to decline the offer.

Post # 6
3572 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I would just ask them in person and let them know there is no pressure.

Post # 7
1777 posts
Buzzing bee

Maybe ask face to face and say you aren’t going to accept a response now, you want them to have a chance to think over the time and financial issues – and you REALLY understand if they say no – you’d rather they be a guest than put themselves in a difficult position. 

If you really want to make it easy on them … make it “opt in”.  As in, If I haven’t heard that you want to do this by Feb 1, I’ll assume that it won’t work for you, and that saying no is just too difficult of a conversation.  

Post # 9
910 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I would wait awhile to ask anyone…..

May 2015 is a bit away and a lot can change between now and then. 

Give it time and wait and see how your relationships are in about a year…..

i would wait until about 8 months before asking people…….

Post # 11
957 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

@cassiedoonie:  Everyone you are going to ask to be Bridesmaid or Best Man will be invited to the wedding, so you should tell all your friends and they can all start saving. Later on, you can figure out who you want to have as BMs and who should simply attend as a guest. 

The topic ‘How to let your potential bridesmaids know it is ok to decline’ is closed to new replies.

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