Post # 1
Hello Bees. I love my friends. I absolutely adore them for the wonderful, unique, and very different people that they are…but many of my tribe of seven bridesmaids are habitually late.
We live in LA. Wedding is in Santa Barbara two hours away. I need the bridesmaids on time and ready to go at 5pm. I have a mix of princesses (spend too much time getting ready and are very late) and hippies (living in the moment and are often late because of the after effects of 4:20’s back in the day).One of the bridesmaids was an hour late to her own rehearsal dinner!
I thought that if I had a bridesmaid event at 3:00pm, everyone would be there by 4:00pm. But what could this be? I thought about mani/pedi’s but I can’t afford to offer it to everyone and I don’t want to force this expense on them. If I offered a chanting/meditation/spiritual cleansing, the hippies would be on time but the princesses would still be applying more makeup.
I would love a ritual/event for the girls at 3:00pm that doesn’t cost too much money…any thoughts? Any excuse to get the girls there at 3:00pm?
Post # 3
I hate to say to be less than honest, but tell that you need them there alot earlier than 5 ready to go-maybe 3? That way, their being late will make them really on time.
My wedding is at 11 am on a Saturday. We have to be ready for pictures at 9. I am getting to the church at 7:30 am to allow plenty of time to get ready. I have asked my bridal party to be there at 7:30 also. Guys are supposed to report at 8. I don’t want any rushing about.
Post # 4
Maybe a bridesmaids tea…have snacks, tea/coffee and their presents.
Post # 5
Are the girls getting ready in SB? That’s a long way to drive with all your makeup on, all dressed up, etc – and for a Sept wedding, I’d be MELTING by then. Depending on your personal timeline, I’d have a bridal luncheon at NOON and then have some place where they could get ready (book a hotel room adjacent to where you are getting ready) or something like that. That way, they are easy to corral, and you could all be together, enjoying the moments up to the big event (vs. stressing out about who is going to show up on time).
Post # 6
how about LUNCH?! at 1pm? Nobody could be late enough for food to ruin your wedding
Post # 7
how about a preceremony photo shoot?
Post # 8
hmm…bridal lunch or photos…that sounds good. 🙂 I don’t think I quite have it though. The biggest time offender is from San Francisco. She couldn’t get there by 1pm. I think 3pm is fair.
Post # 9
I think a lunch or tea is a good idea. Of course, you could always just tell them that they had to be there at 3 and leave it at that. I have a friend who is often late and I just adjust the times when I talk to her. For example, if we’re all meeting for Happy Hour at 5:30, I tell B we’re going to be there at 5:15…then she shows up on time. They don’t have to know that they don’t have to be there until 4.
Post # 10
I don’t think you need to give them a reason to be there at a certain time. Just tell them that you want all of them there at 3 pm. Then, if they all get there by 4 pm, you’re good to go. It is ALWAYS good to have lots of cushion time for a wedding. I started getting ready soooooo early, and STILL ended up being rushed.
Once everyone gets there, you could do a champagne toast & fruit at 4 pm or something like that.
In my opinion, you don’t need a reason for them to be there at a certain time- to me, it’s always nice to spend a little “down” time with your girls before the big moment, and since they are your seven closest friends, I’m sure they’ll all want to spend time with you on your big day.
Do you have a place where you are getting ready near the ceremony site? Because if it is a two hour drive, my guess is that a lot of the girls will drive together. So maybe they could take two cars and you could have everyone do their own hair, but arrive super early to get dressed together and put their makeup on together. That way, you could tell people to arrive between 2-3 pm, and then from 3-4:30ish, you could all get dressed together, they could help you in your dress, etc.
Post # 11
Just say you need them there at 3:00 to make sure YOU look perfect and to talk you into walking down the aisle. That is the whole point of them being bridesmaids in the first place. If you drink – have a champaigne toast and maybe some finger sandwiches. Tell your Maid/Matron of Honor to be the ‘bad guy’ and chase them all down to attend.
Post # 12
Thanks for the tips. I think I am going to tell the girls that the rehearsal is at 4:30pm when it’s really at 5pm. I might even say it’s at 4:00pm. Then I will tell them that we are having a bridesmaid powwow in the room at 3:00 and give them their gifts and do a sparkling cider toast with a fruit/cheese plate. That way I think that everyone will be on time.
Post # 13
I am chronically late, and my mother would always lie to me about the actual time things started. I was always late to her fake time, but on time to the real appointment. You must lie, they will not be mad just relieved that they are not late! If they are on time, they will just have more bonding time with you.
Post # 14
if they have agreed to be there for you on your big day, then perhaps they will really try their hardest to be on time? (**fingers crossed**) Maybe you could have them over a for a bite to eat and a champagne toast prior to the event?
Post # 15
If you need them ready at 5:00 why don’t you ask them to join you at 3:00 for celebratory champagne? It seems like a fun idea and if they are late for that there is no harm done?