Post # 1
Hey bees hey!
I’m having a slight issue and wanted some advice on how to handle it.
When we first got engaged, I inquired with a friend of mine (not a super good friend- not a wedding guest) who is a wedding photographer. Since then she has followed up with me- asking about how wedding planning is going, commiserating etc. Shes super awesome and super sweet.
Since then we’ve found another photographer who is the same exact price, but who’s photos we like every-so-slightly better (just different styles). I’m also concerned about hiring a friend in general.
How do I tell her we are going with someone else? I definitely would like to let her know as opposed to just letting her find out on FB or something. I feel bad :/
Post # 2
- Wedding: July 2016 - The Burgundy Basin
The next time that she brings up the wedding, just tell her and let her know that you have hired a photographer that suits your style a bit more. She should understand in a professional manner that you’re not doing it to hurt her.. it’s just that you found someone that works better for you.
Post # 3
- Wedding: September 2005 - A Castle
There is potential for bad blood here, but honestly. she’s running a business and has to be okay with someone opting to use somebody else. I don’t really think you owe her anything, but if it will clear your conscious, just say something like “I have decided to go a different route.” and leave it at that.
Post # 4
You may also want to point out that she can enjoy the wedding far better if she’s not under the stress of dealing with photos and worrying about possibly disappointing a friend. It’s got to be easier to be a pro photographer for a stranger compared to someone you know well and might worry about letting down. I can almost guarantee that a photographer isn’t paying any attention to the actual ceremony aside from making sure to get key shots, and you wouldn’t want her to miss that, right?
Post # 5
I was basically just honest I didn’t want to hire friends. Tried to say it nicely but for all the friends that came out of the woodwork marketing their direct sales or businesses or photography to me, I just smiled, said “thank you for the information, I’ll look at it more later”, and if they asked again, I just said I didn’t think their product or service would work for me. And when a few people did that to my parents, I just said, “I’m avoiding hiring any friends for anything. If people want to volunteer or gift anything, then that’s amazing! But I won’t risk relationships or friendships or anything by actually hiring a friend or a friend of a friend.” Worked fine and no subsequent drama (at the moment that i know of!)
Post # 6
OP said she isn’t a wedding guest.
Post # 7
whoops. Well in that case I’m with futuremsd1113 on this one.
Post # 8
I think being honest with her is the right way to go. You really like her work but were able to find someone who fits your vision more. I wouldn’t mention the money issue at all. Keep your explaination to a minimum. It doesn’t sound like you two are very close, and this was a business deal considering you were still going to pay her the amount agreed upon (not sure if it is her full price or discount friend price).
Therefore, keep it as a business relationship when saying no.
Post # 9
We went through the same problem with one of my FIS friends whouse are djs. I didn’t want them to dj, and the venue is acousticaly hard to make work, and I didn’t feel they had the experience, we just told then we didn’t want them working at our wedding and that we wanted them to enjoy it and be able to celebrate with us.