(Closed) How to pay for wedding

posted 8 years ago in Money
Post # 32
4799 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I do think it’s kinda crazy to take out a loan – why start your married life in more debt than you have to? 

When we started to look at venues and put together guest lists my parents stepped in and said that they would like to pay for the venue and the food/bar costs, as well as my dress. Which I really, really appreciated. They didn’t give us a budget but I certainly tried to keep the costs down while still having the look we wanted, and I ended up finding a great place where it was less than $50pp for the venue, food, and alcohol. Yes, there were nicer places I loved, but I didn’t want to take advantage of my parent’s generosity so I basically went with the least expensive place that I did truly like.

DH’s parents wrote him a check (also without being asked – if there had been no offered we would’ve paid on our own) for a couple grand, which covered our band and about 2/3 of the photographer. We paid for all the other odds and ends (which add up!) like decorations, linens, the florist, invites, cake, favors, place cards, honeymoon, etc. We had more in saving and could’ve had some of the awesome things I’ve seen like a fancier venue, a photobooth, draping and uplighting, etc. For us it was all about compromise though – we wanted a nice wedding, but we certainly didn’t need some sper lavish event that was going to blow through our savings (which was much better used as the down payment for the house we now live in!)

Post # 33
56 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I think a loan is crazy to use for a wedding- that being said my fiance and I pay out almost three times our mortgage in our students loans so another loan on top of that would make our heads explode.

My mother is contributing about 40%, his mom is about 20%, and we’ll cover the rest from our savings and tax return, including rings and our honeymoon.

Also, we’re very lucky to have moms who are giving money as “gifts” and not using those gifts as a source of control.

Our budget is about 5k and I know it seems really small, but were going to make it happen. I wish I could have a 100k + wedding but I would rather have a smaller simple gathering we can afford than lavish over-the-top debt.

Post # 34
3716 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: City, State

My parents are paying for a little less than a quarter, Fiance and I are paying for the rest.

Post # 35
67 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Me and my now DH paid for a lot of the expenses our selves. My parents paid for the food, which was BBQ, we wanted something simple, and on the less expensive side. And my DH coworker had a beach house, so he gave it to us for the whole week for our HMoon. We used the $$ we got for our wedding, on different excursions on our Hmoon. We paid for everything else, the dress, venue, hair. Oh! but DH mom, who lives in TX, we live in VA, so we dont get to see her ver often, did fly up, and unexpectly (but graciously) paid for all the flowers, and decorations. She use to be a florist so she did all of our centerpieces, bouquets, and botineers herself, but paid for the supplies and flowers! We really got lucky with that part! 🙂

Post # 36
2622 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

Parents- Recepton (food, booze, venue), flowers, limo

Us- dress, honeymoon, rings, tablecloths, decorations, bathroom baskets, day of planner, photographer and all other odds and ends

Inlaws- rehearsal dinner, buses for guests to and from hotel.

I would not recommend a loan. 

If your parents do want to help, but oyu dont want the strings attached, you might see if they want to pay for a specific portion such as a DJ etc. That way its for one item and not a general fund.

Post # 37
6 posts

My fiance and I are paying for our wedding. We have not asked our parents for anything YET we made a promise that the wedding shall NOT place us in debt.  No one needs to go in debt for a wedding under NO Circumstances. You do have a life to live after your 1 day of BLISS is over.

Post # 38
924 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

We are paying 100% of the wedding ourselves and decided to elope and have a destination wedding instead. We are paying as we go. I do not want to go into debt for our wedding.

Post # 39
4277 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

My parents contributed a quarter of the total, so did my DH’s parents. We paid the rest.

Post # 40
3336 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013 - Rhode Island

My dad gave us $15K.  My fiance and I are coming up with the rest (which is about $25K).  Fiance’s parents aren’t contributing.


Post # 41
72 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

My parents are not contributing even though they insist I invite everyone on their list! and Fiance parents paying for about 60 percent. I guess that means the rest is on me and my fiance.

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