(Closed) How to politely tell In-Laws to stop pressuring us to go to church

posted 5 years ago in Married Life
Post # 3
621 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

no need to repost just btt your threads. Smile

Post # 4
9082 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

Say that church isn’t for you, or that since you’re not religious you don’t feel comfortable going to church.

Post # 5
567 posts
Busy bee

It’s a tough one; she’ll have to stop soon otherwise it will become a real source of annoyance to you.  Mother-In-Law needs to realise thatshe can have open arms and mention church once in a while but actually pestering people to go is not the way to go about things. I think you will have to politely explain that you understand her reasoning but that it is not for you and you would appreciate if she didn’t tell you to go.


Post # 6
2622 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I dont think it really requires any discussion.

I think you should say “No thank you” to any invitation.  

Dont give her a reason that she can try to argue back.  You dont need to justify, defend or explain your position especially since its already been explained to her.

Dont give her ammunition to continue the discussion. Just say “No thanks” smile and change the subject no matter how many times she asks you to go to church or about church.

Post # 7
1724 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 1998

ThreeMeers’ advice is great. Handle it the way you would any other discussion: “No thanks.” blhablahblah. “No Thanks.” While you change the subject in between. If she continues doing it, I think both of you just blatantly ignoring her as though she’s said nothing should really get the point across. Otherwise, you both make the mutual decision that it’s time to leave, hang up the phone, or if she’s with you, even be so rude as to say, “Well, we have X going on.” Keep your visits with her brief if she can’t stop proselytizing long enough to associate with her family.


Post # 8
8453 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

@jeannes85:  Well I don’t know about politely and respectufully, but my husband was in this situation with his mother in his early 20s (he only lived a few miles away from her).  He really embarassed her by putting his hand in the holy water and screaming “it burns!!” and she hasn’t asked him to go to church since (he’s 38 now).

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