Post # 1
Member
577 posts
Busy bee
I know the title sounds awful, but it’s pretty straight forward.
There is Valentine’s day coming up, then two weeks later is our official three year anniversary. I don’t think much about Valentine’s day, as I hate going out in crowds and so does SO and we keep it small as a result. So I don’t foresee anything there. Its the anniversary that will be killing me. I KNOW it is not going to happen. But there’s a little voice in the back of my mind that keeps saying ‘what if he’s just trying to throw you off the trail?’ !!!! I hate it!!! I know it won’t be till October or later(which I’m still unhappy about but its another post for another day.)
I’ve tried everything. My hobbies, schoolwork, focusing on the advantages of being single and not engaged, not talking about it to anyone, cleaning, reorganizing, work on my resume and portfolio, even applied for jobs and went on job interviews just for the hell of it! Nothing is working.
It doesn’t help that I’ve just moved recently and most of my friends have fallen out of touch with me as a result and I don’t know anyone where we have moved to. Except my best friend who I’m actually a lot closer to, but I am helping here plan her wedding, which isn’t exactly the best medicine nor make me able to talk to her about what’s going on with me in this department, lol.
AHHHHHH. Any new suggestions to crush my lingering thoughts?
Post # 3
Member
680 posts
Busy bee
@southsun: We are almost in the same position girlfriend! I KNOW that nothing will happen on Valentines day…but a small part of me is still hoping for it. Why? Im not sure. I was doing really well for 3+ months. Just throw yourself into hobbies until you become consumed by them, literally! I got a trainer and made working out my thing. Going to the gym at 5am plus school and working all day makes for a busy me. I am also helping a good friend plan her wedding, while planning her shower and bachelorette party as well. Its hard, but you can do it! Just find something and commit! Also, focus on being thankful for you have with your SO, that helped me a lot. I KNOW its going to happen at some point, and that should really be enough. But us girls always take things to the next level in our heads, haha. Good Luck!
Post # 4
Member
163 posts
Blushing bee
This is something I am struggling with atm. Let me know if you decide!
Post # 5
Member
577 posts
Busy bee
@FutureMrsJefferson: yes I am trying! Good to know I’m not alone, and at least there’s two of us trying to calm our minds!!
@futurejhart: I saw your other thread, so excited for you! Hopefully by the time you read this you won’t be struggling with this thought anymore it’ll be more like, ‘What date should I set???’ 🙂
Post # 6
Member
3062 posts
Sugar bee
@southsun: It is super hard. I am not even close (im pretty sure) I think it will be next year BUT i would be lying if i said there wasn’t a small part of me that is still hoping for it.
Totally irrational lol, but I guess we just can’t help ourselves.
Post # 7
Member
1228 posts
Bumble bee
Eek, you have to just force yourself.. I honestly wish I could go back to the time before I got engaged and have not worried about getting engaged.. If I could get you to do one thing, it would be to enjoy being with your SO and trust that he will propose eventually. Plus it’ll be more of a shock and surprise when he does!
Post # 8
Member
119 posts
Blushing bee
@southsun:
I’ve tried everything. My hobbies, schoolwork, focusing on the advantages of being single and not engaged, not talking about it to anyone, cleaning, reorganizing, work on my resume and portfolio, even applied for jobs and went on job interviews just for the hell of it! Nothing is working.
I admire your energy!
Post # 9
Member
577 posts
Busy bee
@Imhishesmine: Haha thanks! Its a bad thing when you have such an active brain though!
@happilyeveraftergirl: well a big part of it is the timeline got pushed back unexpectedly. I spent one year not worrying about it at all! I was told it’d be within a set timeline we were both okay with. Then he had some stuff to work out and we had to move it another six months. Then his sister moved her wedding up to then so we had to push it another six months. Then he let it slip he’s had the ring for a year. So I have to wait another year, and in my brain the whole thing just seems confusing and unreasonable. I don’t think there’s room left for it to be a shock haha. Maybe a surprise, but certainly not a shock.
@leisha606: Gosh I know! Its like a part of me just wants to throw out the window everything we have discussed. It’s so hard because normally I pretty even keeled over these things, I don’t get stressed or nervous or shaken easily. But I think it’s because in my mind I can’t see a rational obstacle anymore so there’s nothing to hold back all the wondering. Not to mention, no one ever PLANS to be waiting. Or at least I didn’t. I figured everything would line up perfectly! Haha.
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