(Closed) How to put parents names on wedding invites??

posted 3 years ago in Paper
Post # 2
Member
3799 posts
Honey bee

I would ask her what she prefers.

Post # 3
Member
163 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2017 - River Museum & Aquarium

Last option!

 

Post # 4
Member
222 posts
Helper bee

You don’t traditionally put the groom’s parent’s names. I’ve never seen it done like that, it seems far too complicated to me. I just put my mum and dad’s titles and surnames, e.g:

Ms Smith & Mr Jones

cordially request your presence at the marriage of their daughter

Bride’s full name

to

Groom’s full name

date

etc.

 

Post # 5
Member
1350 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2017 - The Lodge at Little Seneca Creek

I don’t think I’ve ever received an invitation with parents’ names on it. I think that’s a more traditional wording (because the bride’s parents used to pay for the whole wedding) and is outdated now…unless you’re having a very formal, traditional wedding. Also, like a PP said, I’ve NEVER seen a groom’s parents’ names on invites. Most invites nowadays start with “Together with their families” or something along those lines. Then you don’t need to include parent names at all. 🙂

Post # 6
Member
8957 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

shell042217 :  Are any of the parents hosting? Or are you including the names because some of your guests might not know who you or the groom are without seeing your parents’ names?

Post # 8
Member
13852 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I think if you’re going to do it, you need to put your parents on the same line.  Otherwise there are just too many lines of random names

Shell042217,
Daughter of Ms. Sally Smith and Mr. Peter Jones

and

Mr.Shell042217,
Son of Mr. and Mrs. Michael and Carol White,

FWIW, my parents contributed significantly more than my in-laws, but they did contribute some.  Our invites were worded as “Mr. and Mrs. James Cricket request the pleasure of your company at the marriage of their daughter Jiminy to Peter Pan, son of Mr. and Mrs. John Hook.”  Or something like that.  I forget the exact wording, it’s been a while.

Post # 9
Member
1009 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: The Retreat at Bradley\'s Pond

Generally speaking you don’t include the groom’s family unless they’re contributing (ie. helping to host the wedding). If they aren’t then the easy button is to not include them. Is is normal!! It feels rude but it’s normal and proper. If you as a couple are putting together most of the money and families are supplimenting then that changes the wording. 

Otherwise, we included my mother in law just because she didn’t understand and was being a pain about not being on the card. She waited until the week before the wedding to give us money we could have used 5 months earlier…again, she’s older and didn’t understand that it would have helped us organize/pay deposits. 

Otherwise we did XXX son of Mrs. XXX. We only did her first name because my husband’s father passed away many years ago so it made no sense. My parents were listed on the wedding invite and Mr. & Mrs. YYY because they’re still married. 

So IF…IF… the groom’s family has to be on the card and they are still married it’s appropriate to put Mr. and Mrs. Robert Smith. 

I believe our wording was similar to JiminyCricket :  

Post # 10
Member
698 posts
Busy bee

I would just ask her. I am from a traditional southern family and would be prefer to have my husband and I addressed as “Mr and Mrs. DHfirst Lastname” 

I have seen it both ways! 

Post # 11
Member
8957 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

shell042217 :  “The reason I would include all names is that all the parents are contributing in some way” — You’re having trouble because this is not what invitations are for. Invitations are not meant to tell guests who is contributing in some way. They are supposed to tell guests who is inviting them, what they’re being invited to (ie, who the guests of honor are), when, and where. That’s it. So when an invitation says “Mr and Mrs Smith invite you to the wedding of their daughter” that’s because Mr and Mrs Smith are the hosts. They are inviting you to something. Maybe they’re paying for it, maybe they’re not, but they are the people inviting you so the invitation says they are inviting you. When the invitation continues on to say “to Jason Brown, son of Mr and Mrs Charlie Brown” these names are included to be sure everyone knows exactly whose wedding they’re being invited to. Maybe the Browns contributed some money, maybe not. Nobody receiving the invitation cares or needs to know. They just need to know who is inviting them, what they’re being invited to, and when & where to show up. If a name doesn’t serve a purpose to the person receiving the invitation, it shouldn’t be on the invitation.

If you want to acknowledge people who contributed to your wedding, you make a toast to them at the rehearsal or reception. Trying to make your invitations do double-duty is confusing to the people receiving them plus it just looks messy.

Post # 12
Member
248 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: Las Palmas

I agree with ecampbell, would ‘Together with their families’ work in your scenario? 

Together with their families

Bride’s full name

and

Groom’s full name

invite you to share in their joy…

This helps to keep it simple and no one is left out. Hope this helps 🙂

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