(Closed) how to set date in miliary

posted 8 years ago in Military
Post # 3
1370 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

We got married after a deployment. We knew he would be home March-ish and set it for late May to be sure he’d be home, even if there were delays.

It wasn’t a perfect plan, but there never will be. We were lucky and it worked out. You have to just take an educated guess. There’s always a chance things won’t work out. If he gets his leave for the wedding approved then look into wedding insurance to CYA if things change last minute.


Post # 4
540 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I had the same trouble with my ex. We decided to just elope, and have a full out wedding when he got out in 3.5 years from then.

It would be so hard to do, but I know people have done it. Good luck to you!

Post # 5
45 posts
  • Wedding: September 2012

“Flexibility is key”

^ This is the mantra of the Air Force, and something that I have to remind myself planning my career and life around the military, along with the wedding. Everything is at the needs of the military. All you can do is dive into it and plan the wedding you want. The biggest thing I can suggest is to have some kind of open dialogue with the chain of command so they can warn of obstacles coming up and be prepared when it’s time for him to request leave. When it comes to TDYs sometimes they can be flexible on the dates, but I would NEVER bank on it! With all that being said you also have to be mentally prepared to pick up and change everything last minute. We had friends in college who set their date right after commissioning expecting to have orders for later that month or the month after. Turned out, with less than 30 days notice, they got orders for before the wedding date and had to move it up six weeks with two weeks notice. Their wedding was so beautiful and wonderful even with the last minute notice, and makes for an uber romantic story lol.

As for our wedding, we picked a date that his command said would work with his schedule, are holding everything on base, and are completely comfortable knowing that we may have to elope instead. I have my dress, he has his mess dress, and we have the rings and that’s all we really need to have a wedding 🙂

Hope some of this helps!

Post # 6
163 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

We got married while he was stationed overseas. We knew it would be though but we just held on hope. My husband knew he would be allowed to come home during his time overseas. He looked at when training was going to be etc. Then we set a date, and prayed a lot. He put in his request for leave and about a month before it was accepted (but it could be revoked at any time). Two we before we knew we were in the clear and everything was finalized. However I was terrified until the moment his plain landed that something would happen.  It is possible to have an old fashion family wedding it just is not easy. I remember the first time I ordered something with our date on it I was so nervous because what was I going to do with it if it changed. For that reason we did  not have a lot of thing personalized but that is ok. You really just have to be flexible and be okay with a change of date of JOP Wedding. Good luck and Congradulations 

Post # 7
5091 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 2012

I have no advice, but I want to wish you luck.  My friends were set to be married this September – they had sent out Save-The-Date Cards and everything – but he finally got word about a month ago that his leave had been denied for the wedding.  He did have a short leave coming up right then, so they rushed out and eloped only a few days later.  They plan on having their big wedding at some point in the future.

Post # 9
873 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

We had a very short engagement.  Long enough to plan a wedding, short enough that nothing was going to change.  It helped that we knew his unit wouldn’t be deploying, and his commander wasn’t a jerk who would send him IA when we’d planned our wedding.  YMMV there.



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