(Closed) How to tell a bridesmaid "No"?

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
9630 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2019

I would insist on paying for her dress, I wouldn’t drop her, ever. She hasn’t done anything wrong.

Post # 4
Member
786 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

You don’t drop her, she is being a stand up friend that still wants to honor you on your day even though she’s fallen on rough times.  You tell her/make her go shopping with you and tell her too bad if she won’t let you buy anything for her.

Post # 5
Member
2196 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

You should just go and buy the dress, or just insist on planning a day to go together and buy it.

I don’t know why you would want to drop her, if you were friends before the wedding then you should still be friends regardless of financial situations.

Post # 8
Hostess
7561 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

I agree with the PPs, take her shopping and insist that you pay. 

Post # 9
Member
8357 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

I would talk to her and let her know how much she means to you and how important it is to you to have her by your side on your wedding day.

If she is prideful maybe loan her the money for the dress rather than paying for it. Let her know that she can pay it back when she is back on her feet.

Post # 10
Member
665 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

no dont drop her, just roll with it. she will let you know if it’s too much for her. suggest at the time you are shopping for the dress that you would like this to be a gift from you to her. tell her it is important to you that she is with you on your special day and they last thing you want is for it to stress her out.

Post # 11
Member
611 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@j_jaye:  “If she is prideful maybe loan her the money for the dress rather than paying for it. Let her know that she can pay it back when she is back on her feet.”

That’s a great suggestion.

Post # 12
Member
327 posts
Helper bee

you should not drop her as he will feel dejected. you should buy the dress for both of the bridesmaids so she doesnt fele like she do it for her only. 

Post # 13
Member
658 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

Just take her out to lunch or breakfast one day and say, ” I think you need a girls day or something to get your mind off of things.” What girl can say no to lunch with her best gal friend? Then, take her shopping. Just say I understand that you don’t want me to buy your dress but you have been there for me, let me return the favor. 

Don’t ever drop her, you obviously care for her deeply to ask her to stand in your wedding so I think you already know that you dont want to drop her.

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