(Closed) how to tell family my little sister was booted out of my wedding

posted 6 years ago in Family
Post # 3
3265 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

Really, you weren’t the one to boot her. She booted herself. Whether she was being dramatic with the comment about the dress or not, she really stepped down all by herself.

Post # 4
2401 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I think I would tell them the story you told us. I dont think you’re wrong at all. Plus, you didn’t kick her out, she left. 

Post # 5
3773 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 1999

I would wait and see how things between you and your sister go over the next couple of months. You have  a while before the dresses need to be ordered so maybe hold off an see ‘if her attitude will change. When it comes time to order the dresses I would tell her she has until x day to order the dress and if she doesn’t it is on her. That way you aren’t kicking her out, she is chosing not to participate.

It sounds like they are already aware of the drama going on so I am sure it won’t be too big of a deal when you let them know that she will be attending as a guest.

Post # 6
1890 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

How old is your sister?  And is she really kicking herself out of your wedding over a dress?

I think a fight w/ your sister and subsequently, your parents over something as inconsequential as a dress is not what you need right now, while you’re planning the most important day of your life.  In your position, I would tell my sister she could wear a different dress, as long as it is the same color as the other Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses, if that’s really the only reason she’s refusing to be in the wedding (why is the dress such a big deal to her, I have no idea).  If that is all it takes to relieve a ton of tension and family drama, I’d say it’s worth it to let her have her way on something, even if she’s being bratty.

Post # 7
308 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I went through something very similar with my sister.  She hated the dress I picked, showed zero interest in the wedding and caused a ton of drama.  I told my Mom that I can’t deal with her negativity and she should just not even be in it.  All I really wanted was a genuine apology.  

Well this turned into everytime I tried to have a conversation about the wedding, my mother was crying about how my sister was not in it.  It was awful.  I told my Mom the problem isn’t me it is with her and maybe she could talk to her about it.  

Your parents may be a good mediator…eventually my sister emailed me an apology a few weeks ago (due to my Mom) and she just got her dress last weekend – and ending up actually liking it when she tried it on.

I mainly did it for my parents…and if your sister is still difficult even after your parents tried talking with her, that is no ones fault but her own.  If it gets to the point like mine did…mother crying all the time (ughhhhh) you may just have to give in unfortunately but at least on your terms (specific designer and color…pick between that) 

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