Post # 1
Here’s my problem, my future Mother-In-Law ALWAYS claims to be broke, which I understand she may very well be. For example, my boys, her only grandchildren, are 18 months and the only thing she’s ever bought them is a pajama and a couple of stuffed toys from the thrift store. But what I don;t understand is I’ve seen her go out to birthday parties with a gift in her hand. Ok, I’m ranting and off topic now.
As I was saying, since she is always broke, how can I tell her to start saving money so that she may by herself a dress to wear at the wedding. Would this be rude? Is it none of my business? I just want her to look nice in our pics! Just to let you know, I have already told her she would need to buy a dress that coordinates with my colors and I said I would have to go with her to choose it (am I being to particular)?
Post # 3
Uhhh.. I’m sorry, but you dont. Her money, her dress… you kinda dont really have any say in it without sounding rude and nosey imo.
Post # 4
@jmares: Yes. Her finances are NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS. Any comment made by you to her would be extremely rude and disrespectful. Regardless of what she wears, she will be at your wedding and in your pictures..you do NOT have the right to say anything about her finances.
Post # 4
Yikes! I would never DREAM of telling my Mother-In-Law what she should wear! That in itself is looking for issues…..
As for the money thing…. again poor form… sorry.
Post # 5
I wouldn’t go there…….
I think the nature of your view of her is rather harsh and also it would be rude to tell someone to “start saving”. If you are so particular and you know of her financial need, then perhaps you could purchase it for her if you have specifics you want to happen and won’t on there own.
Post # 6
I think expecting her to coordinate with your colours is fine, that is not unheard of. But only she and your family know the real financial situation. I have a few family members who are completely broke and I understand they might show up to my wedding in a thrift store dress or in something I have seen them wear 20 times, its okay, I would rather have them there and eating for the next few days instead of scrimping and saving for a dress they might not need.
If she isn’t really broke and just doesn’t want to spend them money maybe you can go about it this way… Tell her that you would like to take her dress shopping on _____ weekend a couple weeks from now and tell her that you are going to start looking for ideas so you know which store to go to. Ask her what kind of length she would want, what kind of fabric she likes, and what kind of price range she is looking in. Maybe if it is just another aspect of the dress that you are asking about she will get the hint.
Post # 7
You girls are right, I have no business telling her to start saving money to buy a dress. I honestly don’t care if it’s a new dress or not, i just don’t want her to look tacky or under-dressed, which is why I said I would go dress shopping w/her.
@globalmargaret , that’s a good way of putting it! I’ll try that!