(Closed) How to tell my best friend that I'm choosing my sister as MOH

posted 7 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 32
133 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Speaking from experience here—my Fiance and I wanted a small, low-key wedding party and decided to name just my sister as Maid/Matron of Honor and his brother as Best Man. My best friend of 15 years I’m sure was very disappointed since we’ve always been inseparable and it was just generally assumed we’d be each others’ MOHs, but remained super-involved and amazingly supportive throughout the whole process.  

I was really anxious, though, because my best friend was the one coming to all my dress fittings, answering my emails about centerpieces, helping me figure out logistics, planning a shower for me unasked…going so above and beyond.  My sister is still an undergrad, she’s younger, so it’s really hard for her to be as involved since she’s only 18.  

Then I realized I was being silly for losing sleep over this—I can just ask my friend to be Maid of Honor, too!  It made my friend SO HAPPY to be honored in that way, and my sister was honestly relieved to be able to share the duties. And she knows how much my friend means to me, so it was a huge win-win. Sister and friend both happy to be recognized, I’m happy because my friend is getting honored for all her hard work and I know I’ll get to return the favor someday as her Maid/Matron of Honor.  

Our wedding party is lopsided now with two Maid/Matron of Honor and one Bridesmaid or Best Man, but I couldn’t care less!  It’s perfect for us.  Just wanted to pass on my story—I’m sure your lifelong best friend will be happy to help, be involved, and contribute just like mine was, regardless of her title. But consider doing two MOHs or just not naming a Maid/Matron of Honor, there are some unique solutions that might make everyone happy that you haven’t considered yet!

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