How to un-ask a groomsman

posted 2 years ago in Grooms/men
Post # 16
Member
9718 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

This is only a tricky situation if you want to salvage the friendship but it sounds like you are ready to move on from this friend anyway. 

I would just be honest that it feels like he’s really pulled away from you in the past few months and that you feel it would be best for everyone if he were no longer a groomsman. 

Post # 17
Member
2236 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2019 - Chateau Lake Louise

cantonbuckeye :  I think you are making this more complicated than it is. You can see the ways this “friendship” has fallen apart. You don’t like how he treats you as a revolving boo-hoo parlor. He seems like a mess. Anyone who would continue to engage in such a toxic relationship with his sometime ex probably isn’t someone you want to be hanging with going forward. He clearly lacks boundaries or the ability to advocate for his own best interests.

Time to call it a day on the friendship. If he reaches out, just tell him you don’t feel like you have space in your life for the drama he brings with him. Assume he’s not intending to be in the wedding if you continue to be out of contact. 

Problem solved. 

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