(Closed) How to unruin the engagement moment

posted 4 years ago in Engagement
Post # 2
Member
3539 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

If he buys the ring and proposes in New York, it’ll still be romantic. It sounds like he isn’t ready, since he hasn’t bought the ring. There’s no way that you “ruined” the engagement. If you’re talking about a lifetime together, this is just a blip. 

Post # 3
Member
2229 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

He sounds full of it to be honest, and only making up this plan because you called him on his weirdness on the last two trips

Post # 5
Member
39 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2018

You will be fine. Just forgot about it.

Post # 8
Member
464 posts
Helper bee

Get it back? Sorry but it doesn’t sound like it was there to begin with. I also find it strange that he said he wasn’t ready, but in the next breath was telling you in detail of his “plan” to propose. From an outsider’s perspective it sounds like some bs…like he was just saying it to make you feel better after you said you didn’t want to marry him.

It seems like you might be waiting for a while with this one. And how hurtful and disrespectful for him to react that way IN FRONT OF YOU when asked about marriage by his friends…TWICE 😡. That seems like a reaction a man in his early twenties, not a 30 year old would have. You have every right to be pissed.

Post # 9
Member
7225 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2016

My husband often tells me that he was “just about to do that!” when he sees me taking care of some matter of business while he was sitting on his ass enjoying leisure time. In response, I usually point out that unless he’s actually in the act of doing something, saying what you were going to do is really easy and means about as much as a fart in the air.

You didn’t ruin an engagement that hasn’t happened yet and your SO needs grow up and stop behaving so immaturely. Telling people that he’s not getting married makes it look like he’s more concerned with posturing and what his friends with dicks think than how you feel and that’s not okay. A better response would be something along the lines of “Our time is coming.” or “I’d prefer not to give any details that might ruin any surprises I might be planning.” with a mysterious smile.

I would have told him off, too. 

Post # 10
Member
506 posts
Busy bee

Yeah, I’m with PP. he said he wasn’t ready. I would be really confused if someone said “I’m not ready” and “it will be soon” in the same conversation. If he really isn’t ready, how can he honestly say he will be ready soon? I think he was just trying to cover his own butt. 

Post # 13
Member
503 posts
Busy bee

View original reply
destiny0410 :  He ruined the engagement moment. Let him fix it. If he doesn’t apologize for being so rude/inconsiderate and make up for it and you’re not happy, then you’ll have your answer.

Post # 14
Member
1073 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

Yeah sounds like BS to me. Typically I find bee’s who are waiting to be overreacting about the whole situation and trying to rush the process but you have every reason to be upset. When he “jokes” that he is “not getting married” he is literally stating that he is not getting married. What else can it mean? So to suddenly state that you had no reason to be upset because he was about to propose sounds made up. Maybe it was a joke, a bad joke? But it doesn’t sound like he’s ready. Maybe you two should talk about this.

Post # 15
Member
1668 posts
Bumble bee

I also call BS, sorry Bee.

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