(Closed) how to? wedding invite wording….

posted 10 years ago in Detroit
Post # 3
216 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2018 - Outdoor ceremony, banquet hall reception

Hmm… this is really tricky.

If your mother is paying for the wedding, I would word it like this:

Mrs. Jane Doe

with the memory of Mr. John Doe

requests the pleasure of your company at the marriage of their (her?) daughter

Jane Sarah


Mr. So and So

son of Mr. So and So

and Mr. and Mrs. Blankity Blank

Saturday, the date here

year here

location here

If everyone is chipping in, I would word the beginnging: Together with their families. That skips all the confusion, and you could add a line at the bottom “In Rememberance of Mr. John Doe”

Good luck!

Post # 4
22 posts
  • Wedding: August 2009

First, I think the name at the top of the invitation has more to do with who is hosting the wedding vs. who is paying for the wedding.  That said, often the person hosting is the person paying!

Second, I think that if you want your father’s name to be included in the invite, the wording should emphasis that he is your father, rather than the idea that he is hosting the wedding with your mother.  Most ettiquette books will tell you that you should not include a deceased parent’s name on an invitation, but I don’t think a rule should stop you if it means alot to you! 

How about this?

Jane Sarah Doe

daughter of Mrs. John Doe and the late Mr. John Doe


James So and So

son of Mrs. New Name

Mr. John So and So


request the honour of your presence (or pleasure of your company)…..


Note: Divorced parents are usually put on different lines without an ‘and’, because including the ‘and’ would imply they were married. 

 Hopefully this helps!

Post # 5
221 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2009
Post # 6
213 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

My dad was so angry with my sister for having his name at the top of the invitations even though he paid for the whole thing.  He was embarrassed…before you commit to anything I would ask everyone if they’re ok with it.  My sister was so upset that he was mad it was just a lot of added unneccessary drama..


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