How to word RSVP to prevent uninvited guests/+1s

posted 9 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
1269 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

I would have it changed to:

_____ of _____ accepts with joy

_____ of _____ declines with regret

And then you can hand write in the of #.  That’s what I fully plan on doing.

Post # 4
799 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I left it up to chance and fortunately, no one responded +1.  A friend of mine actually wrote the guests names in for them on the line.  It was a little “forward” and blunt, but everyone knew who was invited and who was not…so she got her point across.

Post # 5
5977 posts
Bee Keeper

Talishazwi’s suggestion is a good one, and I’ve also heard of bees writing:

2 seats have been reserved for M____________________________

If you only have a single, replace the 2 with a 1 obviously. Hope that works!!!

Post # 6
1801 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I’m definitely doing the ___ of ___ attending with me filling in the second blank!

Post # 8
3162 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I’m going to do

We have reserved ___ seat(s) in your honor    (fill in the number myself)

M _________________________

___ accepts

___ declines


Sadly, you’ll still have people write in whatever they want. I’m going to try to cover my bases and hope for the best.


Post # 9
604 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

we did the same thing that Kittyachi mentioned above and didn’t have any problems with people adding people.  We did have problems with people not filling in the name part so I recommend doing the hidden numbering so you know who the cards are from if that happens 🙂

Post # 10
1336 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

We have the same concerns, so this is what we did:


Number of Guests Invited: __________

Number of Guests Attending: ________


That way there was no confusion.

Post # 11
408 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

@ kittyachi that is exactly what we did:-)

Post # 12
200 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I was a bit forward in my RSVP wording and pretty much worded my response cards exactly like @kittyachi, the only thing is that I had the calligrapher fill in the names of the guests who were invited.

I just sent out my international invitations and the domestic ones are going out towards the end of the month, so I’ll let you guys know how people respond.

Post # 13
720 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I like NeliBee’s idea of having a calligrapher write in the guest’s names, or you can do this yourself if you have nice handwriting.  I am DIYing my invitations and plan on making 100 different RSVP cards listing the invited guests, but I think hand-writing them in is a great alternative!

Post # 14
1696 posts
Bumble bee

This is the twenty-first century, for heaven’s sake! Anyone who is providing vendor services for printing should be able to use mail-merge, with which technology it’s no harder to print cards with a hundred different names, than to print them all identically.

Post # 15
987 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

I was worried about this too and already had my RSVP cards printed so I couldn’t add the “seats reserved in your honor” line.  And I didn’t have an inner envelope either so I ended up adding a belly band around the invite and treated it like an inner envelope.  I had my calligrapher write the first names of those invited on the belly bands and slipped them around the invites.  I didn’t do this for all the invitations, just for those few that I thought might sneak in extra guests or kids. 

Post # 16
768 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2010

I like the “We have reserved ____ seats in your honor” way. It’s concise, polite and REALLY MAKES A DIFFERENCE! I can’t tell you HOW MANY Rsvps we received with extra guests when only ONE person was invited. As I stated on a previous post, one single guest RSVP’d FIVE people. Definitely put something on the RSVP card that indicates how many are invited to accept.

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